Pieces of You
by Neurabe
Summary: A series of Nick/Ellis vignettes. Ongoing.
1. Linguistic Adventures

Author's Note – So, I have a whole bunch of scenes in my head involving these two, but none of them make much sense together in one story. So, I figure I'll just post them as vignettes. There will be no order whatsoever to them and they'll be set both during and post-game.

Linguistic Adventures

The echoes of the long-forgotten movie bounced softly against the walls of the apartment; a flick about a lumbering, white-masked man who was trying to kill Jaime Lee Curtis. Ellis had insisted that it was a classic of the genre and Nick had humored him up until the moment that the second victim had ventured out alone to investigate a strange noise. He'd put his arm around Ellis who was leaning against him and kissed his temple.

"Naw, naw, don't miss this!" he had protested, lightly pushing at him. "This is the best part!"

Nick had laughed under his breath and slid his hand under the younger man's shirt. To his credit, he had resisted for a bit but soon gave into the lips and hands on him. A few more minutes had resulted in Ellis backed into a corner of the couch with Nick all but straddling him, his arms creating a willing cage. Cupping the side of his face with his right hand, Nick's mouth tended to Ellis' left ear, slowly trailing down his neck while the mechanic let his head fall back.

Nick couldn't help but notice that he didn't seem to be all there however. The kid's hands weren't as busy as they usual were when Nick had him in this position. Moving away from the warm skin of his neck, Nick moved to kiss his soft mouth. When the lips against his didn't instantly respond, he pulled back and looked into Ellis' open eyes.

"This movie _cannot_ be that good."

"Hmm?" Ellis responded, seemingly in a dream.

Nick pushed against the couch to look more fully at him.

"Okay, what?" he asked.

"What?"

"What do you mean 'what'? What's going on with you?"

He seemed to tense under him.

"Nothin'," he said. "It's nothin'."

Nick could count the number of times he had had to coax Ellis into conversation on one hand. He could also recall all the times the younger man thought he could lie to him; Nick was good at reading people in general, but Ellis' eyes had always been an open book. He grasped his chin between his thumb and index finger and forced the younger man's eyes to focus on his.

"Do you like the way I talk?" Ellis asked.

"What?" Nick questioned after a pause, his brow furrowing in confusion.

Ellis adjusted himself, pushing his body back and up against the corner of the couch.

"Do you like the way I talk?"

"Ellis," Nick began, moving off of him to mute the television. "What are you talking about?"

Looking away again, the mechanic seemed to be collecting his thoughts before he started speaking.

"It's just . . . sometimes I think people think I'm . . . I don't know, stupid or somethin' 'cause of the way I talk."

Ah.

"Did something happen at work, today?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, these guys . . . I don't know, maybe I'm overreactin' but they jus' . . . acted weird 'round me. Like, I didn't know what I was talkin' 'bout or some shit, I don't know. They kept whisperin' to each other when they thought I couldn't hear. They didn't seem to care 'bout anythin' I said, they only listened to Scott."

Nick played with a curl of his hair while he talked. It hadn't been easy for Ellis to move away from the South but Nick couldn't stay there after everything that had happened and Ellis would have happily followed him to the moon. Still, for the first time in his life Ellis had found himself surrounded by people who didn't sound like him and people asked him where he was from. People reminded him that he was an outsider.

"Did you . . ."

Oh, Christ. Don't.

"Did you think I was stupid when we first met?"

"Oh Jesus, Ellis," Nick sighed, pulling back fully. "Weren't we about to fuck?"

"Come on man, I'm serious," Ellis insisted. "Did you think I was stupid when we met? 'Cause of way I talk?"

Nick ran a hand through his own hair and lowered his eyes, carefully collecting his words.

"Nick?"

"When we first met," Nick began. "I thought you were naïve, reckless, and - "

Ellis was studying his face with an intensity that would have made the white-masked serial killer nervous.

"Somewhat . . . irritating," he said. "But no, I never thought you were stupid."

Ellis continued to stare at him, searching his eyes for any indication of a lie.

"Not even when you was makin' fun of me?"

"I still do, Overalls," Nick said, mimicking his accent.

That got him a small smile.

"Serious?"

"Yeah," Nick said. "Serious."

Ellis relaxed a little, knocking one of his feet against Nick's where it rested on the floor.

"Fuck those guys," Nick continued. "If they're so smart, let them try and find someone who will fix their car better than you can or, better yet, fix it themselves."

Ellis laughed softly.

"You're not stupid Ellis," Nick whispered, leaning in closer. "I don't waste time with idiots. Not even when zombies are involved."

He smiled and leaned up to kiss him.

"Thanks," he said against his mouth.

Humming a response, Nick pressed himself up against him again. This time, he had his full attention. Ellis' hands moved to his lover's waist, gripping onto his hips, while he captured his mouth.

Oh yes, this was much better.

Nick's hands again found their way under the younger man's shirt, rubbing his palms against his chest before pulling back momentarily to remove the soft fabic all together.

"Aw wait, shit!" Ellis suddenly exclaimed.

"What?" Nick asked, concerned.

Sliding out from under him, Ellis grabbed the remote and turned the volume back up.

"You haven't even seen the part where the dude gets pinned against the wall! Man, that shit is the best!"


	2. Dirge

Dirge

Nick cursed silently to himself as the first drop of rain came to a loud _thump_ on his shoulder. He had noticed the overcast sky as soon as he and Ellis had stepped off the plane but had refrained from saying anything out of a high school fear of jinxing. He glanced quickly over at Ellis but the younger man's eyes remained fix straight ahead of him, not seeming to focus on any one thing.

Although it certainly didn't feel that way, Keith had been one of the lucky ones; in the two years of recovery that had taken place so far his body was one of the rare few which had been identified with a relative amount of certainly. Authorities had managed to track down Ellis about a year prior in a search for any remaining family and friends of Keith and with his help had identified his best friend as best as they could. With so many, many dead there was little room for proper procedure and over-the-phone confirmation was simply more practical. Although his body had been badly mangled, the description of the "Bullshifters" t-shirt had nearly brought Ellis to his knees as Nick watched from the kitchen. He'd listened to him verify and express his desire to hold a funeral before hanging up. Without a word, Ellis had walked by him gently smiling at Nick when he'd reach out to touch his shoulder before heading upstairs to their bedroom.

Now, a year later, Ellis stood before a small marker listening to a preacher whom he'd never laid eyes on talk about his best friend as if he knew him. All the victims of the Green Flu had been burned and those deceased lucky enough to have someone identify them got a government issued marker; most people were simply never heard from again. The graveyard seemed massive – just Ellis, Nick, and the preacher – and Nick slowly slipped his arm around his lover's slightly smaller shoulders. There was no reaction from Ellis as the preacher finished his sermon, thanked and blessed the two of them, and made his exit as the rain began to fall harder.

Moving his hand to the back of his neck, Nick gently rubbed Ellis' nape. There was still no response from him as the rain assaulted his black suit. Nick found himself unable to stop thinking about how that suit was the first he'd bought the younger man when things had settled down. Brushing the wet hair from his forehead, Nick bent down to Ellis' ear:

"Ellis?"

Making eye contact with him for the first time since they'd stepped out of the car, Ellis took one last look at the small marker and let Nick led him out. A loud clap of thunder caused Nick to jump slightly and he quickened their pace a little, although they were both already drenched. Using his keychain, he unlocked the doors to their rental car and went around to the driver's side after seeing Ellis into the passenger's seat. Slamming the door more loudly than he probably needed to, Nick put the key in the ignition and pulled away from the cemetery.

All he could hear was the rain. Ellis remained eerily silent at his side, blankly staring out the window. Coming back to his ruined stomping ground to pay final respects to his best friend seemed to have been profoundly more difficult for the younger man than the hordes of endless zombies they had fought off for weeks. He wasn't entirely sure why but Nick half expected this to be just another notch in the fucked-up-belt-of-life, that it wouldn't be too bad. Then again, Nick never really had had any good friends. Or a home.

Still, he wished he would just say something.

The road was nearly empty as Nick drove them back to their hotel; people were only now starting to get back to normal though in much less quantities. It was kind of nice after weeks of panic and terror followed by months and months of confusion and disorder – until you remembered why it was so quiet.

Jesus, it was so damned quiet.

Nick looked back at him again. It was unnerving to see him so silent. Normally he had to fight to get the kid to shut the fuck up for two seconds. He'd never, ever seen him like this – not even when that Charger had badly wounded Coach, when they'd all carried him to the safe room convinced he was a dead man. No, Ellis had never been like this before.

The windshield wipers struggled in vein to clear the rain that beat the car with an unrelenting fury. Weighing his options for a moment, Nick suddenly turned on his emergency lights and pulled off the side of the road. Ellis watched as he put the car in park and then met his eyes, waiting for an explanation. Instead, he watched Nick remove his seatbelt, then his own, and felt himself pulled into a tight embrace.

For a moment, Ellis remained as he had been – wholly still in his arms – but soon fell into Nick's warmth and let himself be held.

"Everything's gonna be okay, El," Nick whispered. "Everything's gonna be okay."

Rubbing his back, Nick felt his muscles loosen under the thick fabric of the suit he wore. Ellis pulled his own arms away from his chest and wrapped them up and around Nick's shoulders, holding onto him as his body began to gently shake. Nick kissed the side of his head as Ellis came apart, sobbing into his chest. As much as it hurt him to hear Ellis in such pain, it was better than the silence.

Nick held tight to him, gently rubbing his back, until the storm passed.


	3. Bad Romance

Bad Romance

Not when things had been at their worst – back when the hordes would just keep coming and coming and coming – had Ellis ever seen Nick's eyes like they were now; they seemed to be caught between madness, rage, and exasperation. His hair was disorganized from him running his hands through it and his flushed chest was exposed from the top buttons he'd roughly undone. After standing still as long as he could Nick had now taken to pacing around the room, continuously passing by Ellis as he sat on the arm of the couch.

"I don't understand why this is upsettin' you so much," Ellis said under his breath. "I didn't mean for you to get all riled up."

"Then why the fuck are you pressing it, Ellis?" Nick yelled. "Why the fuck can't you just let it go?"

Ellis couldn't look away from him. The glint in his eye was downright frightening and he suddenly found himself wondering how many police officers had found themselves victims of that gaze in the past.

"I jus' wanna know is all. It ain't a big deal. Christ, it's not like I'm askin' you to marry me or nothin'." Ellis said, his voice growing louder.

"It _is_ a big deal, Ellis," Nick responded. "It is a big fucking deal because it doesn't mean a goddamn thing."

"If it don't mean a goddamn thing then why can't you jus' say it?"

The younger man found himself wishing he'd never brought it up but they were too deep into it to stop now. Nick raised an eyebrow and leaned in toward him slightly.

"And is that what you want? You just want me to say something that means absolutely nothing to me? Just so you can fucking hear it?"

Maybe a retreat was in order after all.

"Look," Ellis began, rising to his feet. "I'm sorry. Jus' forget it, okay?"

As the younger man moved to exit the room he found that Nick was fast on his heels.

"Oh no, no, no," he said, jumping in front of him and effectively blocking his exit. "You're not going anywhere. This isn't going to turn into some damned elephant in the room."

Ellis sighed and backed a few feet away from him.

"Fine," he said. "Then tell me why you can't say it. Why you won't say it."

"What do you want to hear, Ellis? Huh?" Nick began, his voice growing loud again. "What do you want me to do? Do you want me to get on my knees and profess my unending devotion to you? Do you want a bed covered in rose pedals and chocolate? How about sonnets? Would you like me to compose a few of those for you as well?"

Despite his best efforts to keep his emotions under control, Ellis felt his eyes growing wet. He wasn't about to give Nick any more "stop being such a damned woman" ammunition however.

"All I asked was if you loved me," he said, softly. "That's it, Nick. After everythin' we been through together I . . . I don't understand why you can't say it. Unless 'a course-"

He paused to press the back of his hand into his eyes, stopping the tears before they could fall.

"Unless 'a course you don't."

Something in Nick's face changed, something softened.

"And if that's the case then I jus' wanna know," he continued. "I wanna know. I think I deserve to know. 'Cause I . . . I don't wanna . . . I can't be with someone who don't want me."

Nick sighed and looked downwards toward the floor. He was relatively certain that he'd never hated anyone in his entire life as much as he hated himself right now.

"Ellis," he began, looking back up. "I do want you."

The younger man caught his gaze.

"Then why can't you tell me that you love me?" Ellis looked away as a tear slipped down his face. "Do you, Nick?"

The silence was like a knife in his gut. He stared at Nick awhile longer, waiting for a response – any response – and when it didn't come he sniffed once loudly and moved to make his way around him.

"Fine," he said.

Ellis' fingertips had just grazed the brass knob of their front door when Nick spoke up.

"You want the truth?"

Taking a breath, Ellis turned once again and looked back at Nick. The older man stood limp, the light from the sun briefly making his rings glisten as he rubbed his eyes.

"The truth is I first had sex when I was 15. When I was 16 I had my first relationship," Nick began. Each word was deliberate and precise. Totally honest. "I'm 38-years-old now. I couldn't tell you if I wanted to – and you wouldn't want to know – how many relationships I've been in. What you do need to know is that I fucked around on every single one of them, Ellis. Every _single_ one. Some of them knew, most of them didn't, but I fucked around on all of them. Jesus, I fucked a good friend of my wife's three months into our marriage. And I loved Jenna, I did. I loved a lot of them and I told them all the time and I still fucked around. Not once did I even feel bad about it, either."

He stopped, inhaling loudly as if he was mustering the courage to continue.

"I loved them and they loved me and I still couldn't stand to be with any of them for any extended period of time. Thinking about it now, I'm shocked Jenna and I stayed married for as long we did. That desire to stay . . . it was never there. I was always so damned bored. But . . . ever since I've been with you, ever since . . . we've been together. In all these years, I haven't fucked around on you and _not_ out of some sense of duty or commitment . . . I haven't strayed because I don't want to."

Nick's voice was getting thick and Ellis felt more tears building up in his eyes.

"The thought of being with someone else, Ellis, the thought of it makes me _ill_," Nick's voice was barely audible as he spoke. "I don't know what it is but it can't be what I felt for the others. It can't be the same thing. It's not the same and I can't . . . I can't-"

Nick was cut off as Ellis suddenly came forward and clasped a hand over his mouth. He stared into his reddened eyes as small tear slipped from the right one and landed on Ellis' little finger. Pulling the hand away from Nick's mouth, Ellis leaned in and kissed him. Nick closed his eyes and clasped the sides of Ellis' face in his hands. After a long moment they pulled back, their foreheads pressed against each other.

"I understand," Ellis whispered.


	4. On the Verge

On the Verge

Ellis was relatively certain that he had never been more excited to see a safe room. Correction, safe _house_. One of the first things that he and his new found friends noticed was that few people managed to successfully reinforce their homes before the eye of the infection hit; most safe rooms were in convenience stores, warehouses, or other large communal places. While this usually meant they could always find enough supplies it also generally meant another long night without clean clothes, a shower, and a proper place to sleep.

It certainly had been awhile since they were all this happy and relaxed with one another.

Coach had volunteered to run everyone's clothes through the washing machine – though Nick had opted out with teasing remark about not wanting the older man to ruin his beautiful hands on his dirty suit– while Rochelle set about finding something for them all the eat. As Ellis stood trying to decide if he wanted to shower or look for some clean clothes, Nick moved up the stairs and directly into the bathroom. The gentle click of the lock made Ellis smile just a bit.

Guess that settles that.

"I'ma see if I can find some clean clothes for everyone," Ellis said. "I'll be upstairs if ya'll need me."

Coach and Rochelle voiced their approval as the young man worked his way up to the top three bedrooms. He stumbled into what must have been a younger man's room and found a pair jeans and a plain black shirt that would work for him until his clothes were clean. There was a master bedroom at the end of the hall with a few selections that would hopefully work for Rochelle and Coach but he decided it was best to let them search through the items themselves. He didn't bother looking for Nick since he knew the man well enough to know he would rather walk around naked than in a pair of clean clothes that didn't fit his taste.

"Find anything?"

The sudden voice startled Ellis and he jumped slightly, turning to face Nick who stood in the doorway with a white towel wrapped around his waist.

"Shit, man," he said. "You scared me."

"Did you find anything," Nick repeated, raising an eyebrow.

Gathering what he had found for himself, Ellis moved toward the door trying to ignore the way the water fell from Nick's hair onto his chest.

"There's plenty 'a stuff here," he said. "But I figure you'd wanna look through it yourself."

Nick nodded and moved aside to let Ellis pass by him.

"There should be plenty of hot water left if you want to grab it before them."

Ellis nodded and left the room, hearing Nick close the door behind him. As much as he wanted to he couldn't just take over the bathroom without asking Rochelle or Coach first.

"Hey sweetie," Rochelle smiled as she saw him come back in the kitchen. "Hope you're okay with canned green beans and pasta."

"Sounds delightful," he answered honestly. "Hey, I found a bunch 'a clothes that may work for ya'll in the master bedroom. Ro, I'll take over if you wanna go check it out."

"That's okay," she said. "Dinner's almost ready. I'll look afterwards. Why don't you go jump in the shower."

He tried to hide his excitement.

"You sure?" he asked. "What about Coach?"

"It's alright, boy," a sudden familiar voice to his left said. "I'm so excited for dinner I can hardly stand it. You go on ahead."

Thanking them, Ellis gathered up the clothes he had picked out for himself and headed back upstairs. The door to the master bedroom was still closed and he couldn't hear any movement from the other side. Opening the bathroom door, Ellis inhaled the thin veil of steam that still clung to the air. It smelled like sweat, soap, and dirt.

It smelled like Nick.

Stripping his dirty clothes off, Ellis stepped into the tub and sighed as a stream of warm water hit his tired skin. He tried to relax but as he ran the water into his hair he found that he couldn't stop thinking about him, about what he had done. They'd perhaps gotten a bit too excited about finding that beer in the safe room the other night. Nick and Ellis had perhaps consumed a bit too much after the others had fallen asleep on the cold, cement floor. Ellis had perhaps not been thinking of the possible repercussions when he'd suddenly clasped the side of Nick's face and firmly kissed his mouth.

Perhaps.

Nick had looked at him strangely but hadn't exactly pulled away. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was wishful thinking . . . hell, maybe it had been a mixture of both but Ellis could have sworn that he had seen some interest in Nick's eyes even as he softly suggested they call it a night. As he'd slept with his back to Ellis the younger man couldn't shut his brain off; Nick certainly hadn't reacted violently and despite the stories of his ex-wife and past girlfriends Ellis had most definitely gotten a vibe from him.

Strange that despite everything happening around him there were still certain emotions you just couldn't switch off.

Now the young man stood under the soothing spray of the water and still found himself unable to stop thinking about it. Nick hadn't acted differently toward him since he'd kissed him – which could be both a good thing and a bad thing. Still, it was slowly chewing away at him.

He needed to talk to him about it.

Shutting the water off, he quickly toweled off and slid on the pair of clothes he'd found. The jeans were a bit short but they fit well enough but the shirt seemed to have been waiting for it. Rubbing the towel against his wet hair for a few more moments, Ellis gathered his soiled clothes, opened the door and was greeted immediately by Rochelle who was making her way up the stairs.

"Hey," she said, reaching to take his dirty clothes from him. "Where's Nick?"

"Oh, he's still in the bedroom," Ellis responded. "Not sure what he's doin'."

The young woman's eyes darted to the closed door and then back to him.

"Okay, well, will you go grab him and tell him dinner's ready?" she asked. "And warn him that I'm in no mood for any wise cracks about my cooking."

"Ha," Ellis laughed. "Yes ma'am."

He watched Rochelle head back down stairs before making his way to the closed bedroom door. He knocked gently once, calling Nick's name, and after getting no response opened the door. In the middle of the bed Nick was lying as if he'd just fallen asleep mid-step and collapsed. He'd put on a black pair of jeans he'd found that looked to be a tad too big for him and a white muscle shirt. He was lying on his side, his body curled in slightly toward himself, with his back to the door. The thin shirt he wore had ridden up slightly and revealed the skin of his lower back that still looked flushed from the shower.

The older man's white suit was draped over a large chair in the corner, damp from the cleaning Nick must have given it.

"Nick?"

There was no response from the sleeping form on the bed. Softly, Ellis walked toward him and called out again and again, got no response. Creeping forward, he came to sit on the edge of the bed and looked at Nick's face for a moment. Even in the deep sleep he must have been in, his face looked tense – anxious. If there was one thing Ellis planned to do once this was all over it was sleep.

After a few more moments, he called Nick's name once again and reached for his shoulder. No sooner than his fingers had come to rest on him than the older man came out of his sleep with a violent jerk and pushed away from the source of the contact.

"Whoa, man! Easy," Ellis exclaimed. "It's me!"

Nick looked at him in confusion, his mind still fighting sleep, before he realized what was going on and laid back down.

"Christ, kid," he started. "You scared the shit out of me."

"Sorry," he apologized. "I didn't mean to. I jus' came to wake you for dinner."

"Hmm," Nick sighed. "I'm not really hungry."

"Yeah, but you really should eat anyhow. You know Ro's jus' gonna hound you 'till you do."

Nick started at him for a moment, as if he was going to snap at him and then thought against it. Whatever it was, he was definitely thinking about _something_. Their eyes were still locked and the younger man could feel his heart starting to race. He needed to talk to him, he needed to talk to him, he needed to talk to him. Just say something, get it over with. Tell him it was a mistake. He had to. This sort of thing tended to make zombie apocalypses even more awkward.

"Hey, I, um, I need to, uh, well . . . look, I'm-"

His mumbling came to a stop when Nick closed the distance between them and captured his bottom lip between his own. Ellis' eyes stayed open in genuine surprise for a moment before he closed them and carefully touched the side of Nick's face with his fingertips. The smell carried in the steam in the bathroom flooded his senses again and Ellis couldn't help but smile ever so slightly into their kiss.

"So," Nick whispered, pulling back after placing another quick kiss on his lips. "What's for dinner?"


	5. Some Kind of Monster

Some Kind of Monster

Nick was not a jealous man.

Nick was not an insecure man.

Nick was not – despite his dislike of the proximity of forty - an old man.

Still, as he watched the young woman at the bar blatantly flirting with Ellis he felt a strange twinge in the pit of his stomach. It wasn't long after they gotten together, when the dust of everything had mostly settled, that he learned he could hardly take the young man anywhere without someone trying to pick him up. He couldn't really blame them for having a _pulse_, however; Ellis was an extraordinary attractive man. As if his thick, curly hair, bright blue eyes, full mouth (God, Nick loved that mouth), and athletic body weren't enough, his unawareness of his own beauty just amplified it. Ellis was truly and utterly oblivious as to how breathtaking he was and always managed to be taken aback when he was approached. Nick had tried countless times to warn him that he better wise up before some dirty old man took advantage of him.

Ellis usually said something at that point that earned him a playful punch.

Now, having only left him to go to the bathroom, Nick had come back to find a young brunette practically sitting in his lap. Ellis was laughing and sipping at his beer, his oh-so-adorable accent no doubt pleasing the woman as she leaned in and placed her hand on top of his.

Goddamn it.

Ellis' eyes changed. Nick watched as he shrugged his shoulders and gently moved her hand away.

Good boy.

Adjusting the lapel of his jacket, Nick made his way toward him.

"What's the matter?"

Nick could clearly hear her talking now.

"Some lucky lady already snag you?"

"Well-"

"You're half right," Nick interrupted, coming up to Ellis' side and reaching behind him to clasp his beer on the bar.

The woman stared at them for a moment, taking note of the slight blush on Ellis' cheeks, and laughed.

"Well that just figures," she said.

Nick took a long gulp, finishing what was left of his beer, and once again reached around behind Ellis to place his empty glass back on the bar.

"You know what they say," Nick said. "It was either this or he was going be married."

He could tell she was embarrassed but he really didn't care.

"Well, I _did_ look for a ring," she said, moving off her stool to leave. "Such a shame."

"Oh it's no shame, honey," Nick said sternly. "Just a little unfortunate for your sake."

She forced a smile before glancing once more at Ellis and walking away. The older man watched as she headed back to a group of women, no doubt her friends who would laugh, encourage her and then joke about what a waste it was that such a handsome young boy was with another man. Nick had heard nameless women whisper it before and he fought the urge to choke them each time they said it. The assumption that every good looking man must be an upstanding heterosexual interested in every woman who approaches him no doubt with plans of a house, a white picket fence, and 2.5 kids drove him crazy.

"Sorry," Ellis whispered.

Nick ran a hand across his shoulders.

"Let's get out of here."

He could feel the women's eyes on them as they walked out. Turning his head, Nick found them in the dim room and smiled as he placed a hand on the nap of Ellis' neck. That strange twinge was still alive in his belly however and it was making him feel like he'd snap any second. He felt like he just had to punch something. The chilly October air caused his eyes to focus sharply on the parking lot of the small bar.

"Damn, did it get, like, 20 degrees colder while we was in there?" Ellis asked, moving closer.

Nick wasn't listening. His eyes were searching for a good spot. It was too bright over there, too shady over there. He honed in on an alleyway about fifty yards from where they stood.

It would do.

Grabbing Ellis' hand, Nick ignored his questions and led him to the isolated area. Taking a quick look around (though he wasn't sure the presence of others could stop him now) Nick pushed Ellis back into the brick wall and crushed his mouth to his. The younger man groaned against him, moving his hands to either side of his neck.

"What-"

Kiss.

"What's goin' on?"

Nick ignored his questions and continued his ministrations as the younger man's lips swelled and turned an irresistible shade of pink. Pushing hard against him, Nick's hands slid down his body and tore at the buttons of Ellis' jeans.

"Nick," Ellis managed, breathless. "Nick, wait."

"Shh," He whispered back. "You talk too much."

Before Ellis could mumble anything else Nick dropped to his knees, pulling the younger man's jeans with him, and took the length of him into his mouth. He heard Ellis groan as he swirled his tongue around and around, his hand working the base that he could not take in.

"Nick, Nick, Nick."

He almost sounded like he could cry.

He felt Ellis' fingers gently weave into his hair as his hips bucked forward slightly. Nick waited, his mouth working tirelessly, until his ears picked up on the familiar chorus that signified that his lover would not hold out much longer. Pulling his mouth away from him, Nick stood and pressed their foreheads together, his hand immediately taking over. Ellis' right hand tightly gripped the fabric of Nick's jacket as his body tensed. Pulling him closer, Ellis buried his face in Nick's neck and moaned into his flesh as he came into his hand. Nick kissed his ear and jaw before making contact with his mouth again when Ellis finally leaned his head back.

"Goddamn, Nick," he gasped, smiling lazily. "Goddamn."

Yeah, definitely not a waste.


	6. Circadian Lullaby

Circadian Lullaby

The first thing Nick noticed was the coffee.

Though he hadn't known Ellis before the infection hit, he couldn't imagine that the young Georgian had had such an intense craving for black coffee before the apocalypse. In the time they'd spent sharing their small, government issued apartment, Nick had noticed his young partner's coffee habit increase by the day, drinking more and more later and later into the evening and night.

The second thing Nick noticed was the sex, more specifically, the foreplay. Their nights together had started intense and fierce, a determined expedition toward a blinding crescendo. As days turned into weeks and weeks into months, Ellis had started to deliberately slow the pace – often bringing their exertions to a full stop before slowly starting up again amid Nick's anxious sighs. When the slow ministrations finally yielded a release, Ellis would talk to and distract and kiss the older man until he finally passed out.

It was never for very long though.

For every survivor it was a different challenge. In the years following the mass devastation those who survived struggled with the loss of loved ones, homes, communication – everything they once knew about their life - as well as the painfully slow process of rebuilding it all and returning to some form of normalcy.

For Ellis it was sleeping.

When he would finally slip into unconsciousness, Ellis would practically sleep on top of Nick. Night after night he lay on his side, pressed tight against his older partner while he fought against the images of smokers, hunters, chargers, witches and tanks that consistently tormented him. Nick suffered from the nightmares too, at times he would wake gasping or calling out for help but he always seemed to settle back to sleep quickly. It wasn't that easy for Ellis; he needed contact, warmth, a heartbeat to soothe him. He needed to know that Nick was with him and safe.

The older survivor would do what he could to help, often delaying his own rest until Ellis became tellingly quiet. Nick slowly learned to interpret every twitch, moan and muffled word from his lover's restless body. When his breathing would become gently unsteady, Nick would carefully run his fingers through his hair. A sudden spasm or jerk would result in Nick pulling him tighter against him, often rubbing the back of his neck. If he woke with a start, Nick would pull him back and whisper to him until he fell asleep again.

That morning, Ellis awoke in a panic at finding Nick's side of the bed empty. Rushing from the bedroom he'd breathlessly run down the hall to find Nick scrounging together a breakfast and broken down, exhausted and frustrated. After dinner that evening, as Ellis moved toward the coffee pot, Nick made up his mind.

"You can't keep doing this, El," Nick said softly, coming up behind Ellis to take the coffee mug from him.

"Hmm?" Ellis mumbled, turning to face him and reaching to take the ceramic cup back.

"This," Nick responded, pouring the dark liquid into the sink. "You need sleep."

"Nick! Come on!" Ellis exclaimed. "I don't have much left."

The older man moved to shut the coffee maker off after pouring the remainder of it down the drain, watching the brown splash against the metal.

"You have got to get some sleep, Ellis," Nick continued. "Real sleep."

"I ain't sleepy, Nick," Ellis defended.

"Of course you're not," the older man retorted. "your veins are full of caffeine."

Ellis rolled his eyes and walked away from him, toward the front door.

"Where are you going?" Nick asked, annoyed.

"For a walk, if that's okay with you."

Nick considered his options momentarily before calling out to his partner.

"El . . . Ellis!" he shouted, moving to grab the back of the younger man's arm.

"Get the fuck off me!" Ellis yelled, roughly pulling himself away.

Nick released him, startled, and watched as the young mechanic composed himself. It was rare when Ellis got angry, let alone when he didn't have a horde of zombies trying to rip him apart. There was another emotion behind his eyes however, something other than anger. Without another word Nick watched Ellis back away, lowering his head into his hands and becoming eerily still. When he finally looked up, his cheeks were wet with finger-thick lines of salty moisture from his reddened eyes. As he spoke, his voice didn't seem his own.

"I'm so tired, Nick."

Coming forward, Nick wrapped his arms tight around him and moved his lips to his ear.

"I know," he said. "That's why I have a plan."

Pulling away from him, Ellis looked into his eyes as he waited. Nick traced the line of his jaw with his fingers as he explained.

"We're going to go upstairs," he began. "You're going to let me fuck you into oblivion-"

Nick felt a laugh against his cheek.

"And we're going to sleep."

The older man kissed his forehead as he finished and reached behind him to turn off the lights. Grabbing his hand, Nick led him upstairs to their bedroom and proceeded to make good on his word; they shed their clothes and fell back on their bed, melting into one another. Ellis reached up, pulling down until his partner's lips were a breath away from his own.

"Okay?" the older man gasped.

Ellis thrust up to him, the muscles in his legs tightening to hold him.

"Yeah," he moaned back, bringing their mouths together. "Okay."

They fell apart.

Ellis sighed as Nick collapsed on top of him, their bodies slick and spent. As the older man began to move away, he felt Ellis' legs tighten around him again and he looked down at him knowingly, kissing his waiting lips. They stayed like that for a long moment before Nick carefully rolled to his side, the younger man immediately following and coming to rest his head on his chest.

Close your eyes, the heartbeat said.

It was the sound of the alarm hours later that made him wake. As Ellis blindly reached to silence the incessant beeping he felt a warm hand come to rest upon his on the alarm. Lacing their fingers together, Nick pulled him back, pressing his chest to his partner's back.

"I called them this morning," he whispered. "You're sick today."

Ellis wrapped his fingers around the older man's wrist, feeling his pulse lure him back. He smiled.


	7. Skeletons

Skeletons

"What's this?"

Nick was pulled back from the brink of an unexpected slumber by the familiar voice and the scratch of his calloused fingertips. Legs stretched out in front of him, Nick blinked once hard to clear his vision and slowly took in the image of Ellis sitting close at his side. The younger man had taken his right hand in his and had it pulled up toward his face, eyes locked on Nick's middle finger.

"Where did you come from?" Nick asked, pulling his hand away and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"My mama," came the quick response.

Nick shot him an irritated look and knocked Ellis' baseball cap off his head in one shift motion, slightly satisfied when came to land several feet away.

"You're hilarious," he dryly responded.

"And _you're_ lucky I came out here," Ellis smiled. "I don't think Coach would appreciate you fallin' asleep on your watch."

Oh, right.

It was his turn to make sure the hordes of mindless undead didn't break through the safe room door and rip them to shreds while they slept. Nick could vaguely remember relieving Rochelle – after telling her that if her face was any indication she needed her beauty rest immediately – and following a not-so-playful punch in the arm he'd taken her seat by the door, tactical shotgun at his side. Somewhere between the moon starting to descend and the lack of zombie attacks he'd started to drift off until the youngest member of their group decided to come down and pester him.

"So," Ellis continued, moving to take Nick's hand again. "What is this?"

Nick moved the thumb on his right hand to stroke the gold band on his middle finger.

"This, Ellis," he began. "is a ring."

The mechanic rolled his eyes but noted that Nick didn't pull his hand away again. It had been just about a week since a late-night conversation between the two of them had ended with Nick pressing Ellis against a wall, crushing their lips together until they both were left gasping for air. They'd gone to sleep that night without another word to one another and though they'd never spoken about it there was a unique sense of intimacy that resonated around them now, a veil that neither of them seemed eager to lift.

"I ain't stupid, Nick," Ellis said, decidedly ignoring the smirk on Nick's face. "I know it's a _ring_, what's this symbol on it?"

Nick looked at the face of his ring, held between Ellis' fingers – the circle of arrows woven around skulls barely visible in the low light – and sighed, leaning back into the wall.

"I don't know," Nick softly began. "My mother said it was some sort of symbol of her undying love for me."

Ellis laughed gently and entwined their fingers, waiting a moment for Nick's reaction before he carefully slid closer and rested his head against his shoulder.

"Come on, Nick," Ellis encouraged, his breath warm against the exposed skin of Nick's chest.

"What? Are you saying my mother doesn't love me?"

"I'm jus' curious."

The younger man's thumb was gently running across Nick's knuckle, sending a wave of warmth through Nick that he fought not to acknowledge.

"I can't tell you or I'd have to feed you to the next witch we run into," the older man explained, pulling his hand away to drape his arm around Ellis' shoulder.

The air around them was still and humid, a continuous reminder of Nick's dislike of the south, and yet he enjoyed the warmth of Ellis' body pressed against him. He'd found himself thinking back to that night over and over again but was unable to will his body to do anything about it. For the first time in his adult life, Nick was unsure of how to progress with a person he was attracted to. Under normal circumstances he would have pressed Ellis underneath him and fucked him until they both blacked out but the apocalypse could hardly be considered a part of normal circumstances; it wasn't as if Nick could hightail it to the neighboring state the next day with a quick note and a fake phone number.

In fact, the more time Nick spent around him, the less appealing the thought of a one-night stand became.

"What was in like in prison?" Ellis asked, switching gears with hardly a pause.

"Jesus, El, what is this?" he asked, briefly tugging at curls at the base of the younger man's neck.

"I told you, I'm jus' curious," he responded, leaning back into his touch. "I tell ya'll everythin' 'bout me."

"Trust me, I know," Nick quipped. "And also trust me when I tell you that no account about my time behind bars, my rings, or my demon of an ex-wife could compare to Keith."

"Well, jus' 'tween you and me," Ellis whispered, looking up at him. "Sometimes, not all the time understand, but sometimes . . . I may exaggerate them stories jus' a little bit."

His voice grew quieter as he continued, the last word hardly audible.

"Ellis!" Nick gasped in mock surprise. "I am shocked and appalled! Here I was thinking that the answer to this damn virus or flu or whatever-the-fuck could very well be in the veins of this superhuman. I am crushed with disappointment."

Ellis was fully laughing now, reaching his right arm around to hug himself closer to Nick's chest.

"Nah, don't be disappointed," he smiled. "'sides, seems the four of us are gonna have our fair share of stories once this is all over."

His optimism was adorable.

And irritating.

And sexy.

Nick snaked his fingers deeper into his hair and gently tilted his head up, leaning down to capture his soft mouth. He felt Ellis instantly relax against him and turn his body slightly so that he could more easily move his lips against his own. When Nick pulled back, he found himself instantly leaning in again as Ellis hands grasped at his lapel.

"How much longer you got on your shift?" Ellis murmured against his lips.

Nick pulled back to look at him, sincerely hoping he was interpreting the question correctly.

"Why do you ask?"

He couldn't help himself.

Ellis smiled and slid his hand up and underneath the blue of the older man's shirt, rubbing his hand against his warm skin.

"'Cause I got an idea as to how to keep you awake."


	8. In His Shoes

In His Shoes

Carefully removing an unidentifiable speck of dirt from underneath his fingernail, Nick soothed a crease out of the fine cloth on his thigh and sighed. It had been at least 15 minutes since Ellis disappeared behind the cloth curtain in the empty men's store and Nick found himself wondering just what the hell the kid could be doing.

"Ellis," he called out, rising to his feet.

"What?" the muffled voice from behind the curtain replied.

Moving to stand directly in front of the changing room, Nick put his hands on his hips.

"What the hell are you doing in there?"

"I'm workin' on it," Ellis explained. "This is a complicated process."

"No, Ellis," Nick began. "Evolution is a complicated process. This is trying on clothes."

"Jus' hang on," the younger man said. "I'm almost done."

Sighing again, Nick turned and walked back to the opposite side of the room, lowering himself into the same wingchair he'd previously risen from. Crossing his legs, he leaned back into the leather and took a deep breath, letting his eyes fall closed. Sure, his young partner was taking longer than he had expected but Nick wasn't a man to let a quiet moment escape unscathed. It wasn't until he heard the _whoosh_ of the curtain being drawn back that he opened his eyes.

Had he been asked, it would have outright denied that his heart jumped the way that it did when Ellis finally stepped out into the light of the room.

The young man stood before him – with an expression of uncertainty – in a pair of dark gray slacks and matching three-button jacket that he'd left open. The shirt underneath was a very pale pink that appeared to be captured in the metal of his smooth, flat belt buckle. His chestnut hair - that was normally almost fully concealed by his ever-present baseball cap - hung free and loose, curling just above his shoulders.

He was, in every sense of the word, breathtaking.

"So?" Ellis questioned, extending his arms out to his sides. "What'cha think?"

Before he could answer, the tailor returned with a small cup of coffee that Nick had requested. The well-dressed man let out an impressed breath of air.

"Well," he said, handing the small cup to Nick. "I think you've made a great choice."

Coming to stand, Nick took a small sip of the rich liquid and placed it on the end table before walking toward his partner. Ellis felt the color rising to his cheeks as Nick stared at him intensely, moving in slow circles around him. Finally, the older man stopped, his eyes locked on Ellis' feet, clad in a pair of Italian shoes that were worth more than the mechanic's first car.

"They're a little long," he said softly.

The tailor immediately came to Nick's side, dropped to one knee in front of Ellis to get a better look while the young man stood anxiously as if waiting to be devoured.

"Mmm, yes, but that is easily rectifiable, Sir," he said. "Would you like to have those tailored today?"

Nick gave a brief nod that sent the man into the other room to gather his supplies. Ellis continued to stand stock-still, waiting for Nick to say something else.

"Nick," he urged. "Come on, man. What'cha think?"

Raising his eyes, Nick locked on to him – still unsure if this really was the oil-soaked, coverall-wearing hillbilly he'd met during the end of the world.

"Nick?"

Taking a small step toward him, Nick cupped the side of his face with his right hand.

"You look amazing, El," he said. "Really, _really_ amazing."

Once again, the color rushed into the young man's face and he smiled, turning his face slightly into Nick's hand before clasping it and pulling it down, weaving his fingers through his own.

"Really? You really think so?"

"Yes," he said earnestly. "I really do."

Smiling again, Ellis shifted his shoulders.

"How do you feel?"

The younger man opened his mouth and then quickly closed it again, as if he was afraid of what he was about to say.

"Honestly," the green-eyed man insisted.

There was a small pause before the mechanic responded.

"I feel alright," he said. "It's a little strange though; I feel like a smoker's got me."

Nick laughed a little under his breath and moved to undo the top two buttons of Ellis dress shirt, staring at how the subtle pink glowed against his tan skin. Unable to stop himself, he leaned in took the younger man's bottom lip between both of his in a smooth, slow kiss. Ellis immediately reached for him – taking advantage of this rare public display – and held on to his waist as Nick pulled back.

"Alright gentlemen," the tailor said, coming back. "Everything's set. Are you ready?"

Nick gave Ellis shoulder a gentle squeeze and chastely kissed his lips again.

"Have at him."

. - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - . . - . - . - . - .

The sun had just about set as Ellis finally came through the door, stopping Nick from packing up the dinner he'd made and sticking it the fridge.

"There you are," Nick said as Ellis walked into the kitchen, hands behind his back.

"Where were you?"

"It's a surprise."

"Well I hope it was worth it," Nick said dramatically. "The majesty of this salmon dinner cannot be replicated by the microwave."

For a moment, Ellis felt horribly guilty until he saw the lighthearted look in his partner's eyes as the older man sat at the table and took a sip of his recently poured red wine.

"So," Nick asked, enjoying the warmth that spread throughout his body. "What did you get?"

Grinning from ear to ear, Ellis plopped the bag down in his partner's lap. Snorting, Nick moved the tissue paper aside and then stopped, arching his left eyebrow.

"Jesus, El," he began. "Do you really not have enough jeans?"

"Oh, I do," Ellis explained. "But you don't."

For one blissful moment, Nick remained delightfully confused until it finally sunk in.

"Oh, oh, oh," he laughed. "You're funny."

"Naw, I'm serious," Ellis said, walking toward him and reaching into the bag to pull out the dark blue jeans and white v-neck. "You never dress down."

Looking down at his khaki pants and thin blue sweater, Nick gazed back up at the younger man.

"What the hell do you think this is?"

Ellis just rolled his eyes and pulled the slightly taller man to his feet.

"Come one," he chided. "Try 'em on! I wanna see!"

Nick's protest was muffled by the weight of the clothes hitting his chest. Pushing between his shoulder blades, Ellis steered him toward their bedroom and closed the door firmly after shoving him inside, ignoring his feeble protests and cries of domestic abuse.

Returning to the kitchen, Ellis made himself a plate of gloriously pink salmon, seasoned with a bit of rosemary, and some grilled asparagus. Unable to wait until he sat down, Ellis took a bite of the fish and sighed contently; out of everything that had come as a surprise in his relationship with Nick, the older man's talent for cooking always managed to astound him.

A few moments later, he heard their bedroom door click open and the unmistakable sound of Nick's bare feet making their way back to him. The younger man swallowed thickly at the sight of his always impeccably dressed lover in dark denim that clung just tight enough to his slender legs, the side stitching drawing his eyes upwards to the white shirt that left the top of his chest exposed and beautifully hinted at what it didn't reveal.

He was, in every sense of the word, breathtaking.

"Happy?" Nick asked softly as Ellis stood to walk toward him.

"Very," he smiled, and then paused for a moment to take him in. "How do you feel?"

Ellis could see Nick's mind working, trying to formulate the right word.

"Exposed."

Smiling again, Ellis wrapped his arms around him, his hands sliding into the pockets at Nick's backside as he pulled him tight against his body. Leaning in, Ellis took Nick's lower lip between both of his in a slow, deliberate kiss. When he pulled back, something in Nick's eyes had changed.

"I think you look perfect."


	9. Lost and Found

Lost and Found

The blood thundered in Ellis' ears as Nick closed the door of the disheveled bedroom, pushing the flimsy spring lock with a delicate _click_. The young man reached out as Nick came back towards him, sliding his arms around his waist and seeking the warmth of his lips again. Nick's hands were firm and determined as they roamed up the younger man's arms, giving his biceps a gentle squeeze before moving to cup the sides of his neck. Ellis' breath came in shaky bursts against his face when Nick pulled away for air, his thumbs rubbing the soft skin under Ellis' ears.

He looked at him.

Really, really looked at him.

The lines between what was right and wrong, good and bad were becoming blurrier with each passing second. Nick knew . . . well, he was at least pretty sure that he was taking advantage of the youngest member of their group. I mean, he was right? Ellis really didn't know what was going on – his young hormones were just getting the better of him. No, if things were normal, if things were the way they had been a month ago and the two of them had crossed paths nothing would have happened between them. Or, Nick would have seduced him and taken off the next morning never to be heard from again.

Goddamn zombies.

"Hey," Nick whispered.

Ellis blinked to clear his eyes and clutched at Nick's right wrist that was still sitting against his neck.

"H-hey."

The older man could feel Ellis' fingers trembling.

"I'm not sure this is a good idea, Ellis," Nick said.

Instantly, the Georgian was flooded with guilt and worry.

"Naw, naw, Nick, I wanna," he hurried, his words blending together more than usual. "I really do. I'm sorry if I said something to make you second guess or somethin' I'm just, well, I don't really know but I promise - "

"El, El," Nick interrupted. "It's fine. It's not you. I'm just not sure if this is what we should really be doing in the middle of all of this."

As he spoke, the older man lifted his hands away and toward the ceiling to cement his point; the middle of a zombie apocalypse really was no way to begin a relationship. Or casual encounter. Or whatever the hell this was which was, in and of itself, an issue.

"Well, shit, I know that," Ellis continued, the features on his face softening. "I mean, this wasn't really what I was expected. 'Specially not with how things started 'tween us and shit. I mean, I was pretty sure you'd just outright feed me to them zombies when we first met and to think of where we's at now, oh man, it's just crazy, man. But I'm tellin' you, Nick, I swear, I mean I really - "

"You're rambling," he interrupted again.

The younger man firmly closed his mouth, swallowed, and then spoke again.

"I know," he said clearly. "I'm sorry. I'm jus' . . . well, I don't really know."

Nick's mouth thinned into a slight frown. He wasn't exactly sure when he had become the type of man to care about these things. He's figured the end of the world was bound to bring something out in him and perhaps he just wasn't ready to deal with a forced-reliance on others and . . . whatever these feelings were that had swelled to life concerning the 23-year-old southerner.

"I know," Nick said, carefully taking the hat from Ellis' head to better look into his eyes. "This is the issue."

Ellis reached out tentatively, his fingers groping a bit before finally coming to rest at Nick's waist.

"Nick, I'm . . . look, I'm sorry," the younger man said softly. "If I did somethin' or said somethin' wrong . . . I'm jus' a little nervous I guess."

Nick already knew the answer, but he couldn't stop himself from asking.

"Have you ever done this before?"

Ellis looked into his eyes and gently smiled and Nick could again see his mind racing.

"Well, I um, no," he whispered. "I mean, not with a guy."

Nick continued to hold his gaze.

"Or a girl."

Lowering his lids, the older man sighed softly; hearing Ellis admit his innocence immensely turned on part of him - a large part of him. Nick had been pretty damn confident of the kid's inexperience but hearing him confess stirred something inside of him. It was no secret that Nick loved power, he loved being in control, and knowing that he would be the first to intimately caress the younger man sent a warming pulse straight through him.

"I'm sorry if that changes things," Ellis continued. "I know you must be thinkin' I'm jus' the most pathetic man you've ever come across but, Nick, I . . . man, I wish you could know how badly I want this. I know things is weird – everythin's all fucked up but I ain't ever felt this way about another- "

"Shh," Nick shushed him, reaching out and clutching the side of his face again.

Ellis closed his eyes as Nick closed the distance between them again and pressed their mouths together. His fingers were hot on his neck and the younger man found himself embarrassed at the effect Nick was already having on him; his pants were becoming uncomfortably tight.

"It's fine," Nick mumbled against him.

And it was.

So what if it was the end of the world? So what if Coach and Rochelle were only feet beyond the closed door? So what if they regretted this in the morning? They may not live through the night.

Nick's mouth worked harder against his as Ellis found himself stumbling backwards toward the small bed. The older man's arm slid around his back, pulling his body back tight against his. Ellis' hands were working on the front of Nick's shirt, undoing the buttons with deliberate precision, as he felt the cold rings caress his back.

"You, um," Ellis said between breaths. "Have you done this 'afore? I mean, with a guy."

Working his mouth open, Nick slid his tongue inside.

"Don't worry."

Pulling away just long enough to remove his jacket, Nick pulled Ellis shirt up and over his head before seeking out his lips again. It seemed almost unfair that the good Lord or whomever had graced the young man with such a glorious mouth and yet given him the morals to not be a total whore. Then again, Nick was starting to feel more and more possessive with each passing moment they remained pushed against each other.

Feeling his legs shake Ellis slowly started to sink to his knees, sighing as Nick came with him, carefully pushing the younger man back onto the mattress and immediately coming to straddle him. Ellis tried to remind himself to relax – to breathe – as Nick undid the knot on his coveralls, pulling them down before quickly removing his jeans and boxer briefs as well. He was completely naked, exposed, and painfully aroused as Nick peppered his chest with small, close-mouthed kisses.

Without a word, the older man worked his way down leaving a small trail of moisture in his wake until his lips finally came to wrap around the shaft of Ellis' erection. Fighting the urge to buck his hips, Ellis tangled his hands in the sheets at his side as Nick worked on him, taking nearly his entire length into his mouth and moving his tongue around and around as he pulled away and then back again.

"Nick, oh my God, Nick."

The older man knew it wouldn't be long before Ellis gave in and though he wanted it to last longer he was eager to see what other types of noises he could get to pass between those beautiful lips.

"Nick, I'm . . . Nick, I'm gonna . . ."

He was trying to pull away from his mouth but Nick reached up and firmly took hold of his hips, closing his eyes as he felt the warm liquid hit the back of his throat amid a moan that almost sounded painful. Ellis' chest heaved as his body slowly began to relax and Nick carefully pulled away from him, quietly spitting into a discarded towel at his side before crawling up the tired body beneath him. Placing a knee between his legs, Nick rested his weight on his elbows and ghosted his mouth over Ellis' again, smiling ever so slightly when the younger man kissed him back as if he were just waking up.

"Nick . . . I," he began but stopped as he rubbed his leg against Nick's thigh.

The older man was still very much aroused.

Looking up at him, Ellis reached down between their bodies and unfastened Nick's belt, pulling it open just enough for him to tug the older man's pants down over his hips and free him. The mechanic kept his eyes locked on Nick's as his right hand came to wrap around his cock, his left gripping Nick's bicep. Nick sighed but didn't close his eyes as the younger man worked him slowly and then faster, carefully increasing the pressure.

"S'good?"

Letting a moan slip past his lips Nick bent down and kissed him quickly, pulling away and moving his lips to Ellis' ear before letting his teeth latch on to him as he felt his body give into the young man's hand. Exhausted, Nick collapsed, feeling Ellis' hand move out from between them and come to wrap around his back. They remained like that for a long moment, motionless, before Nick finally pushed up and came to sit on the edge of the bed. Ellis watched as he smoothly pulled his pants back up and clasped his belt back together, leaving his shirt un-tucked as he draped his jacket over his shoulder.

"Nick?"

"You can stay here," he responded quietly. "I'll take the room at the end of the hall."

Before Ellis could think of anything else to say Nick was gone with the firm closing of the door. Confused, alone, and bare, Ellis shakily reached for his clothes and pulled his underwear back on before sitting back down on the bed. The room was much larger than it had seemed before and the young man suddenly felt his chest starting to heave. Curling on to his side, he covered himself with the thin comforter and fought against the moisture building in his eyes as he tried to convince his body to sleep.

He had no way of knowing how long he had lain there in a thin veil of unconsciousness before the click of the door pulled him loose. Opening his eyes, he listened to the footsteps making their way toward him followed by the rustling of clothes before the bed dipped under a new, sudden weight. Blinking his eyes, Ellis rolled over slowly and came face to face with Nick who was lying on his side close to him. Afraid to touch him – to do anything – the younger man waited. After what seemed like an eternity, Nick reached up ran a hand through his hair, leaning in to softly kiss him.

"I'm sorry," Nick whispered. "I lied. I'm new at this too."

Smiling, Ellis pulled himself closer until his head came to rest under Nick's chin. The young man felt hesitant arms slide around his back as he closed his eyes – this time, he feel asleep instantly.


	10. World Without End

World Without End

The moment Nick firmly grabbed the side of his face, pulled him near, and sternly told him to "shut the screaming fuck up for a second" Rochelle knew. Although something inside her had been calling attention to the two of them for a few days now, it was the way the older man's fingers lingered on Ellis' skin that cemented her suspicion.

Now Rochelle was raised by two relatively liberal parents. Her mother and father both worked outside and inside the home and taught her to value life, education, and respect for others. Despite what others around her had preached or believed, she never understood the justifications for hating or otherwise discriminating against someone because of who they loved. Of course when everywhere you went rabid zombies tried to rip you apart, the rules changed. An attachment of any type other than sheer reliance was a liability.

She knew that.

Coach knew that.

Ellis knew that.

And Nick knew that.

They all knew it. They knew it because if they didn't – if they allowed themselves to become distracted – they'd be dead.

And so, despite the fact that Rochelle was – perhaps above all things – not one to meddle in other people's affairs, she approached Nick that night as he made his way to his makeshift bed.

"Hey," she simply said, her fingers catching the cuff of his jacket.

With tired eyes, Nick turned to her and simply waited.

"We need to talk."

"What about?" he asked after a pause.

The young woman swallowed the anxiety in her throat.

"About Ellis."

Nick shrugged his shoulders.

"What about him?"

It was funny that in the middle of the end of the world awkwardness still managed to exist.

Rochelle let her body lean into the wall at her back, her toned arms crossing defensively in front of her.

"You know what, Nick."

The older man stared into her – seemingly measuring her up – before he broke their gaze with a swift glance to the floor and then pulled his sharp green eyes up once again.

"It's none of your business."

She didn't have to respond; he knew he was wrong. It _was_ her business. Everything that any one of them did belonged to the entire group. They'd been fighting for their lives for going on two weeks now and the closer they got to New Orleans the less they could afford to let themselves – any of them – get preoccupied.

"How long has it been going on?"

Nick exhaled loudly and lightly rolled his eyes.

"I said it was none of your business," he repeated, walking to move past the young woman who continued to lean against the threshold of the door.

As he approached Rochelle thrust her arm out and gripped the worn wood of the frame, effectively blocking Nick's exit.

"Rochelle. Move."

There was nothing gentle about his voice.

"Nick," she continued, holding his gaze. "This has nothing to do with you and it has nothing to do with him. This is about us – all of us – about our survival. We can't afford to get distracted. None of us can."

"I'm a big boy, Rochelle," he bit. "I think I can handle it."

"Nick would you listen to yourself," she said, lowering her arm and taking a step toward him, continuing in a hushed voice. "Are you really going to tell me that . . . whatever you've got going on with Ellis isn't affecting you? What about what happened today?"

"Oh for fuck's sake that couldn't have been helped!" Nick exclaimed. "That had nothing to do with me, Ellis or anything other than bad timing and the fact that we don't have eyes in the back of our goddamn heads!"

Rochelle shook her head.

"Bullshit," she said. "Nick, when we met you were sharper than any of us – and happy to tell us about it. You not only have eyes in the back of your head I'm convinced you've got a dozen more pairs hidden somewhere! What happened today wouldn't have happened at all if you and Ellis had been paying attention!"

"Me _and_ Ellis, huh?" he shouted. "Why don't you go bother him about this then? Why me?"

"Because I know it's you, Nick," Rochelle said, trying to lower her voice again. "This isn't something Ellis would do."

"Oh what? Why?" Nick laughed, taking a toward her. "Because Ellis is a good ol' boy? A God-fearing boy? He'd never get involved with someone like me – with a _man_ like me?"

"That's not what I meant," Rochelle said, retreating a little. "I just meant that Ellis isn't the type to . . . instigate these types of things."

"You know him that well, do you?" Nick questioned. "Did I miss something? Did the two of you know each other before the world went to shit?"

"Nick, please," she sighed. "Don't make this difficult."

She sounded defeated and as much as Nick wanted to revel in that, something in the pit of his stomach kept him in check. Against his will his mind went back to that afternoon. He remembered seeing Ellis, noticing the way his eyes lit up when Nick offhandedly had asked him just how Keith had managed to regain consciousness after getting hit with a runaway ATV. It was then that he had heard Coach cry out before the eldest man's breath was stolen by the hunter that had pounced him. The gambler and the mechanic had ended up trailing a bit behind their companions and as a result it was Rochelle who had to knock the hunter back and finish him off while she simultaneously defended herself against three suddenly appearing infected.

When Coach was back on his feet and everyone had their breath back, Nick had grabbed Ellis face and told him to shut up.

Whatever it was that had budded between them had started with an innocent question and a tentative kiss while they'd ventured out looking for food three days ago and had progressed to a hesitant dance; it had no definition, only a curiosity, and today that inquisitiveness had hurt potentially one of the last humans on earth and put another in unnecessary danger.

In his mind's eye, Nick saw Ellis' eyes ignite again.

"You're right," he confessed with a placid breath. "It stops tonight."


	11. Rituals

Rituals

It was methodical, the way Nick dressed.

Ellis had woken to the sound of the metal coat hangers in their closet clacking together. As his eyes slowly opened and adjusted to the morning light, he made out the smooth, pale skin of his lover's back, watching the muscles move as the older man reached for his grey jacket. For a moment, Ellis was crushed that he'd missed Nick slipping into his slate pants but he felt his disappointment vanish as his partner turned around, tossing his jacket at the end of the bed. Nick froze entirely for a moment before shaking his right wrist swiftly, fastening the cufflink.

"How long have you been awake, creeper?"

Ellis smiled and arched his back, stretching into the white sheets of their bed.

"Not long enough."

Relaxing his body the younger man turned on his side and propped his head up on his crooked arm, his cheek resting against his palm. Nick finished with the cufflink on his right wrist and smoothly moved to the other.

"What are you gettin' all dolled up for?"

It was a pointless question; Nick put on a suit to hang out around the house and do laundry. In fact, Ellis could count the number of times he'd seen his partner out of a suit on one hand, not including when the man dressed down for bed.

"Errands," Nick answered softly, reaching for his belt and carefully threading it through the loops of his pants. As he clasped the belt snug on his hips, he reached for his light pink tie and flung it around his neck. Ellis watched the soft silk move against the fine fabric adoring his chest as Nick walked toward him, placing his hands flat on the bed on either side of Ellis' body.

"What are you doing today?"

His lips were only inches from his own.

"Mmm," Ellis began, fighting not to close the slight distance between them. "Got an old 'vette in yesterday. I was goin' get it finished up today."

Nick nodded and smiled gently at him, waiting.

Ellis grinned back and leaned up, pressing their mouths together. They moved against each other lazily, the younger man's hands moving up to clasp the hanging strands of Nick's tie.

"Ah, ah, ah," the elder protested, covering his hands with his ringed fingers. "This tie is new."

"Everything you own is new," Ellis said. "An' perfect."

He kissed him again.

"An' clean."

And again.

"An' . . . you."

When Ellis pressed his lips against Nick's this time, he moved his arms up and around his neck, applying a gentle pressure to pull him closer. Nick weakly protested momentarily but came to sit on the edge of the bed, his neck craned to better accommodate his partner's attentions.

"What time do these errands 'a yours gotta start?"

Nick nipped at his lower lip, humming against him.

"Not long enough for you to take me apart."

Ellis' fingers were already working on the buttons of his dress shirt.

"I'll put you back together."


	12. Alptraum

Alptraum

Everything – everything – around them was quiet.

Still.

Dead.

The sound of Ellis' boot crunching against the pavement seemed deafening as they waited for the evitable - waited for the eye of the storm to pass. Somewhere in the chaos created by the unexpected and unyielding car alarm they'd lost sight of Rochelle and Coach.

Now, Nick couldn't seem to remember seeing them at all.

Any moment that he would have liked to have to himself to further ponder the whereabouts of the other survivors was obliterated as he felt the sickening quiver of the ground under his feet. Eyes wide, he shot a look at Ellis who was looking back at him with the same tired and anxious expression.

Where were their shotguns?

They had only a pistol each.

No Molotovs, no health kits, no pills.

Grabbing the younger man by the bicep, Nick ran toward an overturned truck and threw their weights against its exposed underside just as the Tank came barreling through the eerily deserted intersection. The monster's labored breathing enveloped them as they froze, backs pressed into the belly of the truck. Nick watched as Ellis checked his ammunition and swallowed thickly. They were both only holding the meager supply in their chambers and had no chance of making it to the saferoom in one piece.

The younger man looked up at him with questioning eyes.

"Just don't move," Nick whispered. "Maybe he won't see us if we don't move."

The last thing Nick ever expected was the barely there smirk that graced Ellis' mouth before the younger man bent his knees and pressed his back as far into the truck as he could, pulling Nick down with him. The beast was directly behind them now, pawing at the overturned automobile with one monstrously deformed fist before a sudden rustle of metal caught its attention, sending it roaring down the road like a missile.

The two men held their positions for a few more agonizing minutes before they finally allowed themselves to breathe. Pushing himself away from the car, Nick rested his hands on his knees and took in several deep breaths. Straightening his back, he turned to face his younger partner and felt his brow furrow at the sight of the curved lips.

"I really wish you would tell me what the hell was so funny about that."

Laughing freely now, Ellis playfully punched Nick in the arm.

"I jus' didn't know Tanks and T-Rexs had so much in common, man," he grinned.

Nick stood there, stunned, as Ellis fought to regain his breath. Although he had no earthly idea why what he'd said had been so funny, it was wonderful to see the younger man so blissful. Ellis rubbed the back of his neck as he came closer to him.

"Man, ain't you ever seen 'Jurassic Park'," he asked. "Everyone knows that them dinosaurs can't see you if you don't move an - "

There was a sharp, biting pain in the back of Nick's skull as the Hunter leapt on him, forcing him to the cement and pulling the breath from his lungs as the inhuman claws dug wickedly for his chest. Nick pulled and pushed at the infected straddling him, managing to call out to his fellow survivor and opening his eyes just as the Smoker wrapped his tongue around the smaller man's waist and pulled him away.

Nick gasped in agony – red filling his vision – as the blades of the Hunter's hands tore him open, his ears full of the sounds of Ellis calling for help before he was silenced. Through his own cries - which were now coming freely - he heard the sound of Ellis' bones breaking and snapping under the unrelenting constriction and as he began to fade into unconsciousness, he reached out.

Gasping for air, Nick lurched up in bed swiftly looked around, reaching out to touch the stomach of the man sleeping untroubled next to him.

"Mmm, Nick?

Pulling his other hand to his chest, Nick felt for the gashes he knew had to be there and yet were absent.

"W'as wrong?"

A dream.

Another fucking dream.

Pressing his palms into his eyes, Nick laid back down.

"Nothing," he sighed. "It's alright."

Rolling onto his side, Ellis moved closer to the sweaty body next to him.

"Okay, but if you change yer mind there's more in the fridge."

Moving his arm around him, Nick pulled the younger man close to his chest and buried his face in his hair. He'd never really woken up from the throes of his own sleep and for that, Nick was grateful. It was becoming more and more rare when the nightmares would rip him from his slumber but when it did it was often a horrific ordeal that normally resulted in Ellis sacrificing his own rest to watch over him though he pretended not to.

For now though, the best thing Ellis could do for him was to remain loose and warm in his arms which he contently did until the older man woke him in the early morning with a cascade of tender kisses on his neck.


	13. Tactics

Tactics

Biting his lower lip, Ellis peered out from the hallway at the older man who was sitting in his leather recliner, legs crossed and head pointed down at the book resting against his elevated knee.

"Nick?"

The man in the chair made no obvious attempt to acknowledge him but Ellis took note of how his mouth tightened slightly. Dragging his feet, Ellis slowly came toward him.

"Nick?"

A ringed finger turned to the next page in the book.

"Nick, please say somethin'."

When the southerner again got no response he sank to his knees at the side of Nick's chair and leaned in toward him - his heels digging into the back of his legs - tentatively placing a careful hand on the outside of Nick's thigh.

"Darlin', I know you're mad," he began softly, hoping the rarely used term-of-endearment would help diffuse the situation. "But please try and understand."

Nick's eyes were still pointed downwards at his book but no longer seemed focused on the words. Instead, he appeared to just blankly stare while he clenched and unclenched his jaw.

"You know I would have never done it without askin' you first but the timin' was jus' - "

The older man exhaled sternly through his nose and Ellis stopped talking. Pulling himself up to rest his weight on his knees he pushed at Nick's legs, forcing them to uncross and land unceremoniously on the hardwood floor of their apartment. He then slowly pulled the book from the older man's hands and placed it next to his feet.

Nick still refused to make eye-contact with him.

"Can I make you somethin' to eat?" Ellis asked, shifting his body so that he was kneeling between Nick's legs.

"Or . . .," The younger man's voice dropped to a whisper as he ran both his hands up the inside of Nick's thighs. "We can jus' go to bed."

With a blink, Nick's eyes finally connected with his own. Ellis' face was calm and sincere as his fingers inched upwards, soothing the skin of his partner's legs through the thick pajama pants he wore. Just before the calloused tips reached their final destination he veered off, gripping the armrests of Nick's chair and pulling up to press himself fully between his lover's legs. For a moment, it seemed as though Nick was relenting until Ellis moved to captured his mouth and was met with a careful but forceful shove to the chest, forcing him back onto his knees as Nick rose and stepped broadly past him.

Sighing, Ellis listened as Nick moved to their bedroom and firmly shut the door behind him.

Rising to his feet, the younger man walked to their bedroom door and reached for the golden knob before he thought the better of it and instead opened the hall closet, retrieving a blanket and pillow before he headed to the couch. He could feel the worry working on his face as he shut off the lights and laid down on the makeshift bed, suddenly realizing how large their living room was.

He'd known that Nick would probably not be thrilled but he still hadn't been prepared for the reaction he got.

He should have known better.

It was stupid of him.

He was stupid.

And now Nick was sleeping alone in their big, soft bed.

For nearly an hour, Ellis tossed and turned on the couch trying to think of how he could get himself out of his predicament. He was just about to get up and start pacing when suddenly their bedroom door opened and he heard the familiar sound of Nick's bare feet making their way toward him. Rolling onto his back, Ellis looked up just as Nick swatted at his legs with the back of his hand.

"Move it."

Confused, Ellis pulled his legs up and watched as the slightly taller man climbed onto the couch with him, forcing Ellis toward the edge as he settled between the younger man's warm shoulders and the cool back of the couch. Ellis carefully turned to face him, their legs entwining as he did so, and smiled gently as Nick's arm slid around him, firmly holding him in place.

"So what's its name?"

Ellis' smile stretched from ear to ear.

"I ain't picked one out yet," he beamed. "I thought you'd like to help me out with that."

The older man rolled his eyes but applied a comforting pressure to the base of Ellis' spine as he did.

"So . . . you ain't mad at me?"

Nick slipped the fingers of his free hand into his young lover's hair, pulling his head close to press a kiss to his forehead. Ellis sighed into the touch and slid a hand to the side of Nick's neck, closing his eyes but then quickly snapping them open again when the lips on his skin vanished and the fingers in his hair sharply tugged at the curls.

"The first time it shits, vomits, chews on, drools or does anything else to any article of clothing, bedding, or upholstery I will murder it and then you."

Ellis pressed the palms of his hands against Nick's chest and looked up at him.

"She won't," he insisted. "I promise!"

Arching his eyebrows, Nick released his grip and slid both arms down Ellis back, holding him firmly against him and letting the younger man get settled against his chest.

"What's it called again?" Nick asked.

"A welsh corgi."


	14. Like A Black Fly

Like A Black Fly

With a defeated groan, Nick slammed the passenger side of the truck closed and let his body fall back into the seat. Pinching the bridge of his nose between his middle and index finger he listened as his younger partner entered on the driver's side and started the ignition. They drove in silence for a few moments before Nick shattered the quiet with an obtrusive sneeze and flung his head back into his seat in irritation.

"I honestly can't fucking believe this," he seethed.

Ellis shot him a sympathetic look before returning his eyes to the road. It had been an uphill battle convincing Nick to go to the doctor but the prognosis had assured him he'd done the right thing - even if he did have to contend with Nick's foul mood that was due both to his illness and the admission of Ellis' correct assumption.

"I mean, honestly," Nick continued after inhaling loudly through his nose. "I survive the goddamn Green Flu, Zombie Virus, whatever-the-fuck to catch the _regular_ fucking flu?"

"Nick," Ellis said softly, hoping the tone of his voice would help calm him down. "Be thankful – at least this _ain't_ the end of the world."

Nick shot him a look that would have made a lesser man's blood run cold.

"'Sides, you'll be better in a few days."

Nick continued to bore holes into him.

"Do you ever get tired of being so fucking optimistic?"

Ellis didn't let himself be off put by the biting words; he knew his lover well enough to know he was hurting and probably wouldn't say anything remotely positive for at least 72 hours.

"Nope," he simply ginned back. "Especially not when I got you to balance it out."

Rolling his eyes Nick sank back into his seat again, doing his best to stifle a cough that was clamoring to erupt from his chest. The older man didn't say much the rest of the short ride to the pharmacy and then home both out of grumpiness and, Ellis suspected, the drugs the doctor has given him before they left the office. By the time he pulled into their driveway Nick looked as though he could fall asleep at any moment, were his constant coughing not keeping him from sedation.

Putting the truck in park and shutting off the engine, Ellis moved swiftly to the passenger side door only to find his stubborn partner already maneuvering himself out of the vehicle. Dismissing the younger man with a stern wave of his hand Nick moved to their front door and – after some fumbling with his eyes – walked inside their living room.

"Why don't you take a shower and change into something more comfortable?"

For the first time that day, Nick looked at his partner with sad, defeated eyes.

"I just want to lay down."

Placing the little orange bottles of medication on the kitchen counter, Ellis came toward him and reached the back of his hand out to feel his forehead.

"Jesus, Nick," he whispered. "You're burning up."

Closing his eyes momentarily at the touch, Nick reached up to loosen to the tie at his throat. He was the only man Ellis could think of who would wear a suit and tie to the doctor's office.

"You sure you don't want to shower first?" he asked. "It would make you feel better."

There was a look in Nick's eye, something Ellis hadn't seen since the time a charger had dislocated the older man's shoulder years ago; it was a look of vulnerability.

"Why don't you go ahead and I'll be in there in a minute."

Nick scoffed.

"I can bathe myself, Mom."

The helplessness that was in his voice was mixed in with defiance.

"I know," Ellis insisted softly. "But I want to shower as well and we might as well save water."

Nick stood there for a moment before lowering his head and murmuring an approval under his breath. The older man knew, of course, that it was a deception (and a poor one at that) but the dizziness in his head soon put a stop to his persistent self-reliance. The southerner gave him a few moments, listening to him disrobe and turn on the water, before he made his own way to the bathroom and stripped down himself.

Carefully stepping behind his lover, Ellis reached up to adjust the showerhead so that it reached the both of them, letting his hand run down the length of Nick's arm as he pulled away. As he turned to face him, any sign of resistance seemed to be gone from Nick and was rather replaced by a genuine look of need. Ellis smiled at him sadly and leaned in to kiss his collarbone, feeling Nick's cheek press into the side of his head as he did so.

The room continued to fill with steam as the younger man massaged shampoo into Nick's hair gently, watching as the northerner's eyes closed to the touch. Letting the soapy substance run out of his hair Ellis quickly went to work on his lover's body, using a washcloth to lather soap on and across all the areas he could reach before helping him rinse off. Reaching to shut the water off, Ellis again placed a soft kiss at the base of Nick's throat as he helped him out of the shower and wrapped a plush towel around his waist.

"Feel any better?"

Exhaling loudly, Nick slipped his arms around the younger man's waist and momentarily leaned all on his weight on him.

"Not really," his breath puffed against Ellis neck.

Ellis gripped him tightly and pushed him back up.

"Well, let's get you to bed," he said. "Do you want anything to eat first?"

Shaking his head, Nick followed his lover into their bedroom, letting Ellis gently dry him off and help him into a pair of boxers before pulling back the comforter and ungracefully falling into their bed. Smiling softly, Ellis dressed himself and crawled in next to him.

"No, no, no," Nick protested feebly. "What are you doing? You're going to catch it – go sleep in the guestroom."

Ellis laughed and moved closer.

"Naw, I'm good," he insisted. "Unlike you, _I_ had my flu-shot."

Rolling onto his stomach, Nick pushed himself deeper into the sheets.

"It's your funeral," he mumbled into his pillow.

Shutting off the lights, Ellis settled onto his back and listened to his partner's heavy breathing as he finally fell into a congested sleep. The younger man eventually dozed off himself only to be awoken a few hours later by Nick's sudden thrashing.

"N-nick?" he whispered, turning to face him. "What's wrong?"

Turning his face to cough loudly, Nick gave a defeated grunt and rolled onto his back.

"God damn it, I feel like shit," he explained. "And I'm fucking freezing."

Reaching out, Ellis again felt his forehead.

"It's chills," he explained. "You're still hot."

Moaning, Nick rolled to find his lover's face.

"If I ask you to do something for me, will you do it and never mention it again?"

"Anything."

"I'm serious," Nick insisted. "Consider it a final wish for a dying man."

Ellis laughed under his breath.

"Will you . . . just for a little?"

Ellis smiled and slid closer to him, moving onto his back and slipping an arm around Nick to pull him loosely against his chest. Feeling his breath against him, Ellis lightly ran his free hand up and down Nick's side, feeling his body unwind and his shivering become less intense.

"That better?" the mechanic asked.

Nick had already fallen back asleep.


	15. From The Nothingness

From The Nothingness

Ellis was not a man who was often prone to long periods of intense thought. He was by no means unintelligent but rather eager and always ready to move ahead to the task at hand be it fixing up a busted car, maneuvering through the zombie wasteland or getting a new high score in a video game.

Tonight though, he'd found himself thinking a lot – about Nick.

Well, about himself and Nick.

On this night he sat at their kitchen table, slowly drinking a beer and thinking back to when their relationship began and how he wasn't sure what their late-night, not overly affectionate trysts would turn into, if anything at all. He thought about that word "relationship" in the most permissive manner possible because it had been made relatively clear to him on their first night together that Nick wasn't interested in any sort of real affiliation with him other than the tension-relieving sex he'd initiated between them that night.

And Ellis had agreed.

He agreed because he liked Nick, and because he thought Nick was beautiful, and because he was scared, and because he felt alone, and because it felt good.

Eventually, it felt good, that is.

The first night Nick had laid on top of him kissed his neck and whispered if he was ready, Ellis thought his heart would burst from his chest. Growing up he'd been taught that to even have thoughts of another man was enough to send him to hell; he'd been terrified of his own desires. In his teen years he'd explored some with the girls in his neighborhood but he could never convince his body to participate.

Fear kept his thoughts at bay and hate forced him into isolation.

Then the world collapsed and Nick came into his life. Ellis had been attracted to him from the moment they ran into each other in the burning streets of Savannah. As they made their way toward an uncertain salvation the young man felt his desire for the ex-con growing stronger and stronger which both frightened and confused him.

Not only was he attracted to other men but during the apocalypse.

But the first time Nick grabbed him by the back of the neck and sealed their mouths together in the back of a dirty saferoom he knew he was okay – that everything would be okay. With their hands and mouths they'd given into the trap of one another, falling into a breathless heap and giving over to sleep without more than three words between them.

Slowly things progressed between them until they finally came fully together only a few nights before they reached the bridge in Louisiana that would lead to their deliverance. Ellis had fought against the strange and unfamiliar intrusion in his body, his face and chest flushing a deep red as he sought to hide his face in Nick's shoulder. Carefully, Nick had pushed him back into the bare mattress and pulled his own face down so that their noses almost touched.

He'd told Ellis to look at him. Look at him and tell him he was okay.

It wasn't a command – it was concern.

And Ellis was slowly becoming okay. With each passing moment the feel of Nick inside him became less painful and alien and more pleasing and organic. They'd rocked together slowly until the younger man reached his release, feeling his older lover follow soon after.

That night, as they lay there, Ellis had summoned up the courage to ask what he could put off no longer. Gently he'd whispered into the thick air of the room a question of plans for the day after the next – what would Nick do, where would he go and, finally, could he come with him?

The older man had paused and then pressed a smooth, warm kiss to Ellis temple, pulling him against his chest and telling him to sleep.

A week later they were on a train bound for the north.

Although Nick was generally not physically affectionate outside of their bedroom, Ellis took note of how the older man's temperament began to change: a guiding hand on his back in a crowd, fingers dancing on his thigh in a dark theater, a brush of lips against his neck as he pulled back from a scandalous whisper at a restaurant. One evening as Ellis made his way back to bed from a late-night trip to the refrigerator, Nick had rolled over and hid his head dramatically under the sheets, groaning for him to shut off the lights and adding a mumbled "baby" to the request in lieu of his usual "hillbilly" or "overalls".

As they grew closer, Nick had eventually admitted to his younger partner that although he'd performed necessary intimacies with other men to insure successful schemes in the past, he had never been romantic with one before.

Never before had he worried about pleasing another man before himself.

Ellis had felt his eyes fill with emotion upon hearing this admission for although he'd known that Nick was certainly far more experienced than he was he relished in knowing he was the first man to affect Nick in such a way.

And Ellis loved him more than he could stand and told him so every chance he got though in all their time together, Nick had never said the same.

But it was at moments like these - when Ellis sat sipping a beer at their kitchen table thinking about the man he loved and momentarily questioning the older man's devotion to him – that Nick would seem to sense it, sneaking up behind him to slide two strong arms about his waist and lead him to their bedroom.


	16. Onwards, Onwards

Onwards, Onwards

For the third time in ten minutes Ellis looked out the small window and toyed with the moist fingers interlocked at his lap. He watched as the silver wing sliced through the white clouds causing the plane vibrate gently and, in return, making him shut his eyes tight.

He opened them again when he felt a warm hand come to rest on top of both of his.

"It's normal," Nick whispered.

"I know," Ellis responded almost immediately.

"Then open your eyes."

With a long intake of air, the younger man lifted his lids and pushed himself deeper into the plush seat at his back. When Nick had surprised him with tickets to Las Vegas two weeks ago the excitement had been so strong that for a few days he forgot how terrified of flying he was and had managed to keep it hidden from his partner until he found himself unable to eat anything that morning and was made to explain himself.

"I'm fine," Ellis said.

"Then why do you look like you're about to pass out?"

Ellis turned and looked at him briefly before pulling his hat from his head and running both hands through his hair.

"I'm fine," he repeated. "I jus' need . . . I need a minute."

Standing to his feet, Ellis carefully maneuvered over Nick's legs and made his way down the narrow aisle to the nearby bathroom. Sliding the fragile door closed behind him, Ellis secured the lock and turned on the faucet of the tiny sink, cupping his hands to collect the water and then splashing it on his face repeatedly. Feeling the cool liquid run down his face calmed his nerves a little but he couldn't stop himself from thinking that below his feet was a layer of metal being propelled miles above the earth.

Then there was a slight knock at the door.

"Someone's in here," he called out.

"It's me," a familiar voice responded.

Shutting the water off, Ellis wiped his face with his hands before shaking the excess water off his palms and undoing the lock. Sliding the door back, he was met with his partner's blank face.

"Did you get sick?" Nick asked pointedly.

"No," Ellis said softly. "I jus' needed - "

He was cut off by the pressure of Nick's hand on his chest as he was shoved back into the small room, watching with confused eyes as Nick closed the door behind them and locked it back in place.

"Nick?" he questioned. "What – what are you doin'?"

Sliding both hands on either side of Ellis' neck, Nick pulled their lips together, feverously moving his mouth against the younger man's. Their breath bounced against the walls as Ellis clasped Nick's wrists, pulling away.

"Nick?" he breathed.

Without missing a beat, the older man caught his mouth again, pushing him back against the one bare wall in the minuscule space.

"Nick, what are you doin'?"

Pulling back, Nick's hands sought the waistline of Ellis' jeans.

"I'm distracting you."

Undoing the buttons, he pushed his hand down into the denim and behind the boxers finding warm skin that jumped at his attentions.

"Is it working?"

Ellis gasped and let his head fall back against the flimsy wall. For what seemed like endless moments he let his partner continue, using his talented fingers to work his flesh to a full state of arousal before remembering their surroundings.

"Stop," he protested weakly, eyes falling closed. "We can't. Not here."

Sliding his jeans down and letting them pool at his ankles, Nick went to work on his own belt.

"Then we'll just have to be quiet then, won't we?"

It was Ellis who leaned in this time, locking his arms around Nick's neck and pulling the slightly taller man against him. In-between kisses the southerner slid Nick's jacket off his shoulders and ran him hands up and down his toned arms, feeling the muscles under the fine fabric of his dress shirt. Pulling at his lower lip as he leaned back Nick slowly turned Ellis around, immediately pressing his chest to his back to replace the warmth.

"Mmm, Nick."

Nuzzling his nose against his check, Nick prompted the younger man to crane his neck so that he could take this mouth again. Twisting an arm behind him, Ellis ran his hand through Nick's hair as their tongues danced with each other. Pecking at his lips a few more times, the older man reached into the pocket of his slacks to procure a small bottle of lubrication before letting his pants join Ellis' at his feet.

Pushing cap open with a flick of his thumb Nick swiftly coated himself with the slick concoction, pausing momentarily to kiss his partner between his clothed shoulder blades, before he sealed the bottle and let it fall to the floor. Reaching to catch Ellis mouth as he offered it again he clasped a hand on Ellis' hip and positioned himself at his opening, letting the head tease for a moment.

"Nick," the southerner moaned, resting his forehead against the wall. "Nick, please."

Without further hesitation Nick slowly pushed himself fully in, gasping at the feel of his partner's body accepting him totally. For a moment neither of them moved, they stood still leaning back and into each other for support before Ellis pushed back, encouraging Nick to start moving. Breathing deeply the northerner pulled himself out and then pushed back in, his free hand curling up to stroke his partner's strong chest, feeling the vivacious heart thump within.

"Nick, oh God . . ."

"Shh," he breathed into his ear. "Shh."

Pulling his earlobe between his teeth, Nick's mouth came to rest at the junction of his partner's neck and shoulder amid the slick sounds of their flesh coming together. Outside the door they could hear other passengers talking, laughing, and asking for drinks as Nick increased their pace, keeping his grip tight on his partner's hip in an attempt to hold him still. Obscenities were softly falling from his own lips as he used his free hand to wrap around Ellis' leaking flesh.

The younger man cried out then but Nick found himself uncaring and unable to stop as he drove himself in faster and harder. A delicate hitch in the back of the younger man's throat signified to Nick that he was moments from his release and he moved his hand from his hip to clasp it over Ellis mouth. He felt his fingers quiver as the younger man moaned loudly, his body releasing against the wall in front of him. As Ellis came down, chills and spasms running through him, he felt Nick bite down on his shoulder as he came inside of him.

"Shit . . . Jesus," Nick breathed, turning so that his cheek rested against the nape of Ellis neck. "Ellis."

Ellis smiled at the lazy, drunken kisses Nick dragged along his slick skin – his shoulders, the back of his neck, his ear, his cheek – for Nick's affections always came loving and gentle and insatiable after orgasm. After a few long moments, they stopped and he winced slightly as Nick carefully pulled out and reached for his pants. Grabbing a piece of toilet paper, Ellis cleaned himself as the wall before tossing the crumbled wad in the toilet and smiling sleepily as Nick pulled his boxers and jeans up for him, kissing his lips before pulling back and clasping his own belt at the front of his pants.

"That help?"

Ellis laughed then and leaned in to kiss him, his body still shaking softly.

_**A**_**uthor's Note **– Hey guys. I wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for reading and commenting. I'm really hoping you all are enjoying these stories because I'm having a great time writing them. However, with the exception of one or two more potential stories, I'm running low on ideas. So! If you have an idea for a segment, leave a comment or send me a private message and we'll see what happens. Thanks again!


	17. Wonderland

Wonderland

"Nick!"

No, it's too early.

"Nick! Nick, wake up!"

The older man groaned under his breath and pulled the sheets of the bed up and over his face as he rolled to his side. The firm mattress supporting his body bounced with the sudden added weight as Ellis placed an excited knee on either side of his body and shook his shoulder gently.

"Come on, Nick!" he whispered excitedly, his mouth close to his groggy partner's ear. "Come look!"

Cracking one eye open, Nick lifted his head slightly and slowly made out his partner's ear and wisps of dark hair. Taking a quick glance at the clock Nick then let his head fall back into his pillow.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?"

The body above him pressed down just a bit more.

"It's beautiful outside," he smiled. "It's unbelievable! Come on! Jus' come look!"

"Ellis," Nick began, voice thick with sleep. "It's snow. I've seen it before."

The body above him sank down, pushing warmth against him and it was then that Nick realized how cold the bed had gotten.

"Just . . . ," Nick mumbled, reaching for Ellis' arm. "Just come back to bed, will ya?"

The younger man smiled as he gently bit the lobe of Nick's ear before pulling himself up and bouncing off the bed, practically skipping out of the room to the kitchen. Eyes closed, Nick listened to the sound of his lover's socked feet, soon accompanied by the enticing sound and smell of coffee percolating. Nick pulled his arms tight around himself and rubbed his naked biceps before slowly sitting up.

"Come on, come on," Ellis exclaimed, bounding back into the bedroom and rushing to the closet to grab the nearest long-sleeved shirt he could find and throwing it at his partner's bare chest. "Get dressed!"

Before Nick could say another word Ellis was gone again, his excited footsteps rushing back across the kitchen floor and out the backdoor without another word. Blinking his eyes to clear the sleep from them the older man slid the warm shirt over his head and around his torso.

Nick knew that life in New England would be a wholly new experience for Ellis and that no matter how hard he tried to crush his excitement he knew his young partner would probably combust come the season's first snow. Turns out, he didn't combust. He'd probably just break his neck running down their narrow, snow covered stairs.

A welcoming beeping from the kitchen sang out to Nick that his coffee was ready and he dragged his bare feet across the hardwood floor to the mug that Ellis had placed out for him. Adding just a touch of cream, Nick carefully sipped the hot liquid and pushed the curtain of their large window aside. Snow was falling lightly, adding to the pristine white blanket that covered their once green backyard and though Nick spied several footprints he found no other sign of Ellis.

Sighing, the older man finished his coffee and trudged back to their bedroom, slipping into a pair of jeans and a long wool coat before he fashioned his boots on his feet and opened the backdoor. The light of the sun bounced off the snow and caused his eyes to squint as he carefully worked his way down the stairs, placing his hands in his pockets and calling out to his partner.

"Ellis?"

Hearing nothing, Nick turned around and searched confused when he was met with nothing but more white.

"Ellis!" he called, louder this time.

It was then that Nick heard a familiar yet oddly quiet sound behind him. Instantly, the older man knew what was about to happen and he straightened his back and raised his head.

"Ellis," he began. "Because you are young and naïve I will give you a fair warning: if you do it, you will be spending the rest of the winter on the couch."

Slowly turning to face him, Nick tilted his head to the side as Ellis sadly smiled and dropped the freshly packed snowball from his hand, wiping the excess snow away on the side of his jeans.

"That's what I thought," Nick said. "And for fuck's sake kid, where is the coat I bought you?"

Ellis looked down at his Midnight Riders hoodie and shrugged.

"Don't need it," he explained simply.

Laughing under his breath, Nick opened his mouth to explain the physics of a Massachusetts winter to his lover but was cut off when the younger man suddenly took a running-dive at him, throwing his arms around his upper legs and bringing the older man crashing onto his back atop a thick blanket of snow. For a moment, Nick simply lay there with his mouth agape, his mind trying to process what had just happened as Ellis crawled up his body and placed a hand on either side of him, staring down into his stunned face.

Biting his lower lip, the southerner kissed the tip of Nick's cold nose.

"I love you," he said simply.

Blinking firmly, Nick opened his mouth to retort but stopped before the first word escaped and just laughed. He laughed as if he hadn't done so in ages and the bouncing in his chest continued even as Ellis moved to lay the side of his head against it, the two of them melting into each other in a cold sea of white.

"There's something wrong with you," Nick said, voice still light with laughter.

"I do love you, Nick," Ellis responded. "I'm happy we're here. I'm happy . . . I'm jus' glad I'm here right now."

A few quiet moments passed before Nick let his arms fall into the snow at his side and gathered up two frigid fistfuls, simultaneously rubbing it into the hair on either side of Ellis' head.


	18. Promise

Promise

Nick was far more nervous then he would ever have admitted as Ellis opened the door in front of the them and quickly walked into the small bar. When Ellis had first told him about the post-apocalyptic southern reunion his instinctual reaction had been to firmly refuse. However, the more his younger partner talked and talked and talked and fucking talked Nick finally accepted just how important it was to him.

Still, finding himself in a redneck bar miles away from the nearest clean hotel and about to no doubt be scrutinized down to his very bones by Ellis' closest and most legendary friend was making him uncomfortably warm. The fact that Ellis had insisted that Nick wear jeans and a plain black T-shirt only made him feel more out of place.

"Oh, my GAWD!" Ellis yelled, waving his arms above his head. "KEITH!"

Nick was pulled back to the present by his partner's yelling as he wrapped his arms around another young man who came barreling toward him.

"Oh, man, Ellis!" He said, voice slightly muffled by Ellis' shoulder. "How in the goddamn hell 'ave you been man?"

"Great, man, jus' great!" Ellis said, pulling away to look his friend in the face. "I mean, ya know, all things considered, right? I mean, I'm still here and you're still here and oh!"

His head whipped around and bright eyes found him.

"This is Nick," Ellis smiled.

The northerner came forward and extended his hand.

"Nick, this is Keith."

Nick locked their eyes as the surprisingly attractive man came toward him and grasped his hand firmly.

"Nice to meet'cha, Nick," he said.

"Likewise."

Ellis smiled as the two men pulled apart.

"Man, I can't believe we're all here!" he exclaimed. "I mean, who coulda guessed how all of this would have turned out. I mean, shit! It's incredible."

Keith grinned and met his friend's eyes again.

"I know man," he smiled. "And you ain't never gonna believe who else is here."

Ellis eyes grew so bright Nick was sure they had absorbed all the electric light in the room.

"Who?"

"Dave?"

"AW SHIT! DAVE'S HERE TOO?"

Keith laughed and turned around, pointing with his right index finger to the antiquated jukebox in the corner of the room where a young, muscular man stood chatting with a younger woman.

"Oh HELL!" Ellis yelled. "Nick, come on, I want you to come meet Dave! Or wait, do you wanna get a drink or somethin' first? Are you hungry? Do you want anythin'? The food here ain't the best but it's purty tasty just the same. Oh man, Keith! 'Member that time we snuck in here after hours and you revved up the deep-fryer to make us some-"

"El, man," Keith interrupted. "I do remember that shit! Man, it was unreal! We can talk about that later though. Go say 'hi' to Dave and I'll take care of Nick here."

Ellis gave his partner a mildly concerned but still wholly excited look.

"Yeah, ok," he said. "That okay, Nick?"

God, no, please don't leave me here.

"Yeah, it's fine," he said. "Go say 'hi'."

Ellis practically squealed as he ran off, embracing Dave with the same excitement he'd shown Keith. Alone, the two men shared a few moments of silence before Keith clasped a hand on Nick's shoulder.

"Wanna get a drink, man?"

Not really.

"Sure, that sounds great."

Keith smiled and led him over to the bar, ordered two drafts and took a seat on a nearby stool as Nick settled next to him. When their beers arrived, the two men took a few deliberate sips before sitting together in silence.

"So, Keith," the older man spoke up, unable to stand the quiet any longer. "You look different than I imagined."

When the young man laughed instantly, Nick felt himself relax a little. With smooth, unblemished skin, full, clean hair, perfectly white teeth and a body free of any obvious long-term damage, Keith was far from the scarred young man Ellis had painted.

"Yeah, Ellis is a well-meanin' soul but he um, he tends to exaggerate jus' a bit sometimes."

Nick raised his eyebrows as he laughed a little under his breath.

"He's a good man though," Keith continued. "He's a real good man."

Nick suddenly found himself unable to look at him. Keith was right, of course. Ellis was a real good man. He was good and young and sweet and innocent and everything he wasn't. Nick corrupt and old and bitter and tainted.

He knew it and Keith knew it.

"Look, Nick."

Oh fuck. Just, please – make it quick.

"Look, man, I . . . I ain't really sure how to say this so I'm jus' gonna say it as best I can. I ain't gonna sit here and tell you that I was over the moon when Ellis told me about'cha. I mean, I kinda always knew about him, ya know? Hell, I think I knew before he did. But a'course it wasn't my place to say nothin' to him about it and truthfully I . . . well, I wanted to be wrong."

Nick swallowed thickly as Keith continued.

"Surely it ain't easy bein'. . . bein' that way anywhere in the world but I sure as shit know it would be a hell of a lot harder for Ellis bein' that way in the middle of backwoods Georgia. An' he's my friend, ya know? He's my best friend. There ain't nothin' I want more in this world than for him to be happy. And if him bein' happy means being with you then . . . well, then alright."

Nick turned his head to face him.

"Nick, now, you're gonna have to gimme some time, ya hear? I mean . . . it's a sin, man. It says so right there in the good book and I can't turn my back on that. But I also won't turn my back on Ellis and I do think people is born that way - the way God made 'em, ya know? Ellis is a good man and Nick, if he's so crazy about you then you must be a good man too."

It was then that Nick felt a cool calmness seep deep down into himself.

"So I jus' . . . I jus' need to know one thing from you alright?"

Nodding his head slightly, Nick waited.

"Do you love 'em?"

Nick lowered his eyelids for a moment before looking back up into the waiting amber.

"Yes, I do."

And even though he'd never told Ellis that, Nick found that as the words left his lips he absolutely meant it.

"Well alright then," Keith said, patting him on the back playfully. "That's all I needed to know man."

Taking a long swig from his glass, Keith stood as Ellis started walking back toward them.

"You jus' take good care 'a him you here?" he said before he pulled himself close to whisper in the older man's ear. " 'Cause if I hear otherwise you and me are goin' be havin' another conversation."

Nick looked up and smiled as Keith intercepted his friend, giving him another warm embrace.

"You done good, El," he said softly.

Ellis stood motionless for a moment, grinning softly at his friend who slapped him gently on the cheek as his eyes betrayed the welling emotion behind them. With another smile, Keith walked back toward another group that had gathered in the center of the room as Ellis came toward Nick.

"Hey," he said, much more subdue.

"Hey," Nick responded, standing and suddenly leaning in to place a chaste kiss on his lover's lips.

Surprised at the display, Ellis felt himself blush and bit his lower lip as Nick pulled away.

"Come on," he said. "Let's go introduce me to Dave."

Note – Thanks to xBlackDahliax and Arsenal Averson for this idea.


	19. Adjustments

Adjustments

With every change there was always a period of adjustment. New shoes had to be broken in, new diets required an alteration of expectations and tastes, and new music demanded space within a person's memory. The same, of course, was true of new relationships and after living with Ellis for a little over two months Nick was learning that it didn't matter how incredible the sex was or how he felt about the kid (truth be told he wasn't really sure himself) living with the younger man posed several challenges.

For example, Nick was a meticulously clean and organized man. Years of presenting himself as an approachable and trustworthy individual to unsuspecting marks meant he always had clean hair, bright skin, spotless clothes and a complete awareness of his surroundings, exits, and the literal and figurative tricks up his sleeve. Ellis however was a man who made his living inside the slick blackness of car engines. His person and clothes were always grimy and wherever the young man went a trail or fingerprint or smudge of greese seemed to follow. After Nick nearly had a conniption over a spilled plate of crumbly cookies in their bed the younger man had been more careful and in turn, Nick had tried not to let it get him so upset but found it much easier to just shove the kid under a hot stream of water or threaten to kick him out.

"It's fine, Nick. It's fine! Look, it ain't even difficult to clean up. Quit lookin' at me like that!"

Then there was a talking. It wasn't that Nick was incapable of enjoying a hearty conversation but sometimes he would just stare at Ellis blankly waiting to see if the mechanic would manage to pause for air. To be fair, the older man knew of Ellis' habit of running his mouth long before he decided to live with him but listening to stories about his idiot friends in a filthy saferoom was one thing - hearing stories and musings and general observations morning, noon, and night was wholly different.

The kid even talked in his sleep.

Oh Christ. Sleeping. That had to be the biggest change.

Nick was used to and very comfortable with sleeping alone. Even when he had been married he never really liked having his wife sleep next to him. The bed always felt too heavy or too full and she was half the size of Ellis and hardly ever moved in her sleep. The kid, on the other hand, had kicked and slapped Nick in his sleep more times that he could count. For awhile, Nick had forced Ellis into the spare bedroom after sex but would always wake up (or be woken up) to find him sleeping next to him and after awhile he gave up.

"Didn't I throw your twitchy ass out last night?"

Sleepy eyes would look up at him as a hand came to rest on his chest.

"I like sleepin' next to ya. You're warm."

"Then why do you keep trying to kill me?"

Ellis would apologize but he couldn't help it, and Nick knew it. One particularly restless night Nick had been startled awake with the back of a hand to his mouth and following the confusion had wrapped his arms around his restless partner and pulled him to his chest. Had he been fully awake, Nick never would have done such a thing but pulling Ellis to him meant his limbs wouldn't suddenly assault him. Nick secretly suspected that Ellis was aware of his actions all along and did it only to get closer to him but he refused to voice it.

There were of course benefits to sharing a bed with Ellis: when Nick lay on his back, feeling his heart thump against his sweat-slicked chest, he found himself wondering how it was possible that sex with Ellis was so continuously incredible. Nick had been with more than his fair share of partners – both male and female – but it had never been as wholly satisfying as it was with Ellis. Maybe it was the younger man's eagerness to please or his complete trust of him but whatever it was, there had hardly been a mediocre night between them.

"El . . . "

"Come on, Nick. I just wanna make you feel good."

Sigh.

"Jus' once. If you don't like it, we'll stop. Jus' . . . let's do it once. Let me make you feel good."

That had been a first for Nick. And he had liked it. Not as much as Ellis would have liked but the kid had had the best teacher and after a few minutes of uncertainty and pain, Nick had been able to relax and enjoy the pressure and strain as the younger man pulled in and out of him. Ellis had whispered to him constantly, encouraging Nick's legs to wrap around him as his pulled their chests together, seeking reassurance that everything was okay and Nick had grabbed the flesh of his backside to pull him closer.

That night, Nick found himself feeling uncharacteristically affectionate and playful with him until he'd been awoken with a swift kick to his gut and had bludgeoned the side of Ellis' head with a pillow.

It wasn't just his nights that were now spent in the company of another. Whenever Ellis was home and consciousness he seemed to be with Nick. Even if by some miraculous occurrence the younger man had nothing to talk about he simply wanted to be in the same room as Nick. For the most part, as long as the older man could get him to shut up Nick didn't mind too much with one exception: the morning paper.

Since he was in his early twenties Nick loved starting his morning with his feet on a coffee table, the morning paper and a cup of black coffee; he would pour over the print in front of him and enjoy the silence as his body slowly adjusted to being awake. Ellis, however, would almost always wake within an hour of Nick leaving their bed and pad out to the living room where the older man sat.

"Go back to bed."

"You come back to bed."

"I'm not a child. I don't sleep until noon."

That wasn't fair. Ellis was up before dawn most days to get to the garage on time but Nick still felt the urge to tease him on his mornings free.

"Come on, Nick."

The older man felt his eyebrows lift as he looked up from his paper for the first time since his partner had walked into the room. His hair was disheveled and his eyes heavy with sleep. The left leg of his soft pajama pants had ridden up over his ankle while the other still came to a gentle rest on the bare skin of his right foot. He looked lost and helpless.

It was then that Nick realized that despite his messy mannerisms and consistent chatter, his twitchy sleeping habits and oil-stained hands, a masochistic part of him enjoyed having him around. When he wasn't things were too quiet, too clean.

Sighing, Nick beckoned him with his index finger and placed the paper on the arm of the couch as Ellis walked over to him, settling on to the couch and moving with Nick as the older man encouraged him to lie down and rest his head in his lap. The younger man closed his eyes as Nick briefly toyed with his hair before reaching for his paper again, holding it over Ellis' head as he continued to read.

"You headbutt me in the nuts and we're fucking done."

Ellis laughed and kissed his clothed knee before settling back into sleep.


	20. Up His Sleeve

Up His Sleeve

Keep your eyes still.

Don't blink too much.

Don't let your fingers rub the backside of the cards.

Don't tremble.

That last part was somewhat difficult to avoid when the only thing separating him from complete nakedness was his hat and boxer-briefs.

"Your move, Hillbilly."

Ellis raised his eyes to meet the steady gaze of the fully clothed man sitting across the small kitchen table. Breathing in deeply, Ellis cleared his throat and lowered his cards face-up on the polished wood. The older man took in the three 9s in front of him and after a pause lowered his own cards to reveal all five of his decorated with hearts.

"God damn it, Nick!" Ellis exclaimed. "How the hell are you doing this?"

Nick smiled and pulled back, leaning into his chair and gazing over at the pile of Ellis' clothes near his feet.

"This was your idea," he smirked. "You knew what you were going up against. Now pay up."

Nick decorated the end of his demand by beckoning, palm up, with four fingers. The younger man sighed and crossed his arms over his bare chest.

"No."

"Ellis . . ."

"No, Nick! I'm freezin'," he complained. "I'm done! This ain't fair!"

"It's not fair that I'm winning?"

Ellis arched an eyebrow.

"It ain't fair that you don't play fair."

"Oh, yeah?" Nick grinned. "How so?"

"You . . . I don't know! But I know it can't just be luck that's let you win 6 times in a row!"

Nick only laughed a little and held his hand out, waiting for his partner to remove one of the two articles of clothing he still had and place it in his palm. Ellis pursed his lips tightly and sat still for a moment before his face suddenly relaxed.

"Strip."

"Excuse me?" Nick questioned.

"Strip," Ellis repeated. "Right now."

"That's not how this works, Cletus."

In a moment the younger man was on his feet, his bare skin decorated in goosebumps as he walked over to where Nick continued to sit, head tilted up slightly to watch him approach.

"Gimme your hands," Ellis said.

Nick held out both of his hands, smiling as Ellis wrapped his fingers up and around his wrists. The mechanic's strong digits searched up his partner's arms, reaching as far up as he could under the restriction of Nick's jacket as he sought vindication.

Unsatisfied, Ellis roughly slid the jacket down Nick's shoulders as far as he could with the older man still sitting.

"Hey, hey," Nick said, moving to stand. "Careful with the fabric."

Ellis rolled his eyes and continued to remove the article of clothing, throwing it on the back of the nearby couch. Feverously, Ellis dug his fingers into the breast pocket of his dress shirt before he ran his hands up and down the length of his partner's lean body. Nick let a small moan escape his lips as he lowered his mouth to Ellis' ear, kissing the soft skin right behind his lobe.

Ellis smacked him away with a determined wave of his arms.

"Stop," he said not taking his eyes off Nick's torso, desperately searching for a trick he knew had to be there.

"You haven't checked my pants yet," Nick whispered, moving his face close to the other man's again. "Why don't you get to it?"

The older man's hands moved down his partner's bare back as he spoke, his lips finding their way back to his ear.

"Stop tryin' to distract me," Ellis protested, his voice growing soft. "I know what you're doin'."

"Oh? How about what _you're_ doing?"

Pulling tight, Nick pressed the younger man against him as his felt his flesh come to life.

Looking up, Ellis rolled his eyes but let Nick's lips fall on his as his ringed fingers continued to tighten against his back. As their mouths played against each other Nick moved Ellis fingers to his belt, letting their tongues touch as the mechanic's hands unfastened it and ripped it free of the loops in his slacks.

As the younger man began to pull at the waistline of Nick's pants, Nick carefully reached around to his own back under the guise of assisting his partner in the quest of removing his clothing. Carefully, he removed the Ace of Hearts from the top of his trousers and palmed it before returning his hands to Ellis' warm skin, allowing the card to flutter to the floor with the remainder of their clothes.


	21. Navigation

Navigation

As the tall machine in front of him sang - spinning its three illumined, decorated reels – Ellis grabbed for the cold bottle resting on the stand at his side and took a small slip.

Cherry. Seven. Orange.

Licking at the taste of beer on his lips, the young mechanic reached for another quarter and let it slip into the silver slot at the side of the machine. As the cylinders danced around and around once more, he turned slightly in his chair and scanned the room. A good distance away, Nick sat at the same poker table he'd been engaged with for nearly three hours. Dressed in a black suit and crimson tie, his lover was the typical picture of calm and composure that Ellis had come to know well. What the southerner didn't know very well was the game of poker but judging from the pile of chips in front of the familiar ringed fingers it appeared that things were going well.

Hearing a chiming at his side, Ellis turned back around in his chair as the blinking yellow machine began spouting random colors and started releasing quarters into the waiting tray near his knees.

"Oh, hell yeah!"

Leaning down, Ellis gathered the silver coins in his hands and moved them into the small, paper bucket at his feet. When the machine stopped dispensing quarters, Ellis had made 47 dollars that quickly made him forget he'd already put nearly that same amount into the machine at the start of the evening. Grinning, he turned to see if he could meet Nick's eyes but found the older man to be unflinching within his own game.

Deciding in favor of another beer Ellis quickly finished the remainder of his bottle and headed up to the cashier, exchanging his coins for bills. Grabbing another beer from the bar the young man then walked slowly up to the table where Nick was playing. He knew better than to try and get his attention; as effortless as his partner made his skills look, Nick was actually intensely focused and more than likely wouldn't even see him. All that existed to the seasoned gambler were the other people sitting around the green felt.

Nevertheless, Ellis walked slowly by table and couldn't suppress the small laugh of surprise that escaped his lips as Nick not only briefly met his eyes but also winked at him before turning his attention back to the game.

Things must have been going well.

Really, really well.

Finding the slot machine he'd left was now occupied, Ellis opted to instead walk around the spacious casino. It was the first time he'd been to Las Vegas and all though he missed the peace and quiet of their New England apartment he had to admit that all the glitz and glam was exciting. There was always something going on, always something to do, and never enough time to do it all. Nick, of course, knew the city like a second home.

Flying them both of out for a vacation (very near their anniversary although the older man refused to acknowledge it) Nick had made quick work of showing Ellis his favorite sites around town – mostly consisting of different bars and gambling halls. Tomorrow, he'd made Nick promise to take him to the Speedway which he'd agreed to do in exchange for certain favors that made the younger man blush just to think about them.

He wondered briefly if it was strange that after all these years together Nick could still make the heat press against his cheeks before a strong hand came to rest squarely between his shoulder blades, steering him toward an unknown location.

"Nick?" Ellis questioned, turning his neck to find his partner directly at his side.

"Keep walking."

Ellis' eyebrows furrowed as he allowed Nick to lead him into the nearby bathroom, locking the door after checking for fellow gamblers and finding none.

"Nick? What are you doing?"

"Take off your clothes."

" . . . what?"

"You heard me," Nick stated. "Strip."

Laughing, Ellis bent his elbows to allow his hands to rest on his hips.

"You should at least buy me dinner first, darlin'."

Coming forward quickly Nick reached out and tore at the younger man clothes, skillfully avoiding his lips as he unfastened the southerner's jeans and pushed them down, roughly removing his work boots, before reaching for base of his shirt and pulling it over his head.

"Nick!" Ellis exclaimed. "Slow down."

Again, the younger man tried to connect their mouths but instead found himself kissing his partner's jaw as he moved away and began to shed his own clothes. Ellis watched as the tie, jacket, shirt and pants were gathered into Nick's arms (he'd never let those clothes touch the floor of the public restroom) and then extended to him like a gift.

"Put these on," Nick said simply as he pushed his clothes against Ellis' bare chest and removed his dress shoes.

Confused, Ellis watched as Nick then re-dressed himself in his jeans, t-shirt and boots. The mechanic scarcely had a moment to admire the way his jeans clung to his lover's legs before Nick was turning to the mirror and running a quick hand through his hair, reaching into the pocket of the borrowed jeans and pulling out the keys to their rental car.

"Meet me out front in two minutes."

"Nick? What the fuck?"

Coming toward him, the older man grasped him by the sides of his neck and kissed him quickly.

"Two minutes or you're walking back to the hotel."

With that the older man turned, unlocked the door and rushed out of the bathroom.

"What the fuck?" Ellis repeated to the empty room as he quickly dressed himself in Nick's clothes. Well, as best as he could. He didn't bother with the tie, instead opting to sling it loosely around his neck.

Opening the door to the bathroom, Ellis made his way to the front door but gasped when he was spun around swiftly. A large, well dressed man stood before him seemingly seething with anger that drained from his face when he made eye contact with Ellis.

"Shit," the stranger said. "Sorry, sir. I thought you were someone else."

"S'alright," Ellis said, flustered. "It's fine."

Nodding, the stranger turned and scanned the room as Ellis shook his head and moved faster to the door. No sooner had he stepped out into the dry night air than Nick drove up in the borrowed black BMW and unlocked the door. Before he had time to fully close the door Nick was peeling out, speeding toward the highway.

"Nick, what the HELL did you do?"

Smirking as the car came to rest at a red light, Nick leaned over and pulled Ellis toward him with a hand on the back of his neck. This time, their lips met. They breathed into one another, moving their mouths heatedly until Ellis was forced to pull back to catch his breath.

"Let's get back to the hotel so I can let you start convincing me why I want to go out to that hillbilly racetrack tomorrow," Nick whispered against him. "Then I'll convince you why you need to get better at poker."


End file.
